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His hand slips down my thigh, gripping me tight and guides it around his hips. It opens me wider to him, and I feel him even more. When I open my eyes I’m met with his, he usually holds back so much from me but he can’t keep this from me. I see too many emotions there. Nyx is feeling what I’m feeling. An overwhelming pleasure roots deep inside me, outweighing the pain, and my stomach clenches, my skin prickles, and for a moment I worry I might pass out.
This level of intensity can’t possibly last forever, but with Nyx slowly rocking inside me I can’t ever see it ending.
“Fuck Ell,” Nyx growls, burying his head into my neck. “You covered?”
I can’t speak. My breath keeps catching in my throat every time I try. “Ell, I’m about to fucking shoot my load inside you. Are you covered?” Nyx repeats, his voice strained and uncontrolled.
“Yes,” I manage, before letting go of everything that’s been building inside me. His cock suddenly feels bigger and as I throb around it, Nyx growls low into my ear, his body turning rigid as I feel him spill inside me.
We’re both breathless, his head buried into me and his lips touching at my skin. It takes him a while, but eventually he pushes himself up. His long arms supporting him as he hovers over me.
“That was pretty fucking awesome, princess,” he smiles down at me and God, I love it when he smiles and have the sudden urge to kiss that sexy mouth of his. So I shift up onto my elbows and help myself to it.
“Can you stay?” I ask him, then notice how his eyebrows crease together. “Tonight I mean, could you stay here with me? My parents are out and the doors locked. If anyone came you’d have time to sneak back out.” His eyes follow mine over to the balcony doors. “You don’t have t…”
“I’ll stay,” he interrupts me, slamming his lips onto my mouth, this time hard and possessively. His cock flexes inside me and I look down between our sweaty bodies to where we’re still joined.
“Maybe we could go again,” I suggest, and he huffs a laugh at me.
“Let’s see how you feel when I pull out,” he winks, causing a flutter between my legs which I wonder if he notices. He pulls out from me slowly, and I hate the instant emptiness and then…
Wow. Sore. Very fucking sore.
I move to sit up and it hurts.
“Fuck.” Nyx’s face looks worried as he stands up straight and pulls up his underwear.
“What?” I follow his eyes to where they’ve settled between my legs and curse out loud myself when I see the red blood streaks all over my white cotton duvet cover.
“I’m so sorry, Ell. I didn’t think. Are you okay?” I’m still staring in shock. Sure I was expecting something, but not this. How the fuck am I going to hide this. “Ell.” Nyx grips at my shoulders and forces me to look up at him. “You alright? You need a doctor or summit? I don’t know what’s normal. I’ve never…’”
“I’m fine, a little sore but okay.” Moving to stand up, I wobble on my feet, and when I go to take a step forward. A pain shoots through my center and I try not to yelp.
“Come on.” Nyx scoops me off my feet and carries me into the bathroom. He places me on the surface beside the sink and then surprises me when he turns on the faucet, filling the bath. While the water fills up the tub he comes back to me, standing between my legs and kissing my cheek, neck, and shoulders. I swear I hear him whisper a sorry after each touch his lips make against my skin.
When the bath is ready, he carries me over and gently submerges me into the warm bubbles. Then taking a sponge from the basket he starts moving it over my skin. We both stay silent as he washes me. Him looking mad at himself, while I try and think of a time where I’ve ever felt more cared for.
“I can’t hurt you, Ell,” he speaks so quietly that I barely hear him, his eyes remaining focused on the sponge as he squeezes warm water over my back.
“I think it’s like that for everyone the first time.” I reach behind me and take his hand with mine, pulling it in front of me and kissing his knuckles. I can’t have him feel bad about this. Not when I’m so happy.
“Don’t trust anyone, Ell. You gotta learn to be strong and take care of yourself.” His eyebrows tense together. He wraps his hand around my jaw, holding my face up to his so I can’t look away from him.“And know that no matter what happens, I never would intentionally hurt you, okay.” He kisses me hard on the lips and I nod my head back at him despite feeling a little haunted. Not just by what he’s said, but how he’s saying it. It’s as if he knows something that I don’t and it’s a cold reminder that I really know nothing about his life.
“Rest here for a while,” he tells me, pressing his lips to my forehead, before standing on his feet and leaving the bathroom. I hear him fumbling around in my room for a while and then silence.
I wait as long as possible before curiosity wins over and I get myself out of the bath before grabbing a towel from the rail and wrapping it around me. I’m scared to step through the door into my room in case he’s left, and I breathe a heavy sigh of relief when I see him. He looks huge sitting on my vanity stool, his shoulders hunched forward, and hands hanging between his knees. My bed has been stripped and remade, the dirty sheets balled up in the corner of the room. He’s fully dressed and it makes me want to cry. I really don’t want him to leave, not after what’s just happened between us.
When he looks up from the floor, he looks destroyed. Any trace of the smile he wore before has completely vanished. I hope he doesn’t regret what just happened. What if this is all too much for him, I go to him, standing myself between his legs and he rests his head against the soft towel I’m wearing, wrapping his arms around my hips and holding me tight to him.
“I got some real feelings for you, you know that?” he tells me without looking up. “Just the thought of anyone hurting you… I need to protect you. Always.” I run my fingers through his hair and nod my head even though I know he won’t see me do it.
“I hurt you, Ell, I was selfish.” Pulling his head back he looks up at me and his eyes look heavy with guilt.
“Nyx. I wanted that. I needed it. It was always going to hurt the first time and, well, you’re a little above average down there.” My attempt to make things a little lighter between us fails.
“I’d kill anyone who ever hurt you,” his jaw clenches tight. “I mean it, a life would mean fuck all to me if it was a threat on yours. Even if I thought they’d hurt you just a little bit. I can’t be the person that hurts you.”
“You could never hurt me,” I assure him, placing a kiss on the top of his head as he grips my body tighter. “What just happened with us was the most amazing thing that’s ever happened to me. I want to do it over and over with you. Well not right now, cause well I am kinda sore but…” Nyx quickly stands up, lifting me off the floor.
