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“When I get back home, I’m gonna get straight to work on it. Maddy found some night classes I could take and I can volunteer in the meantime…”
I don’t know what the hell she’s talking about but hearing her mention home feels like a punch to the balls, and that warm feeling inside me suddenly shifts into something that claws at my flesh.
“Sounds great, Gracie.” I get up from the couch and move into the kitchen, gripping at the edge of the unit to try and contain my frustration.
This isn’t the girl’s fault. This isn’t even my fucking fault. This is all Tobias Saunders’ fault. He put the hate in my heart, he stole my chance at ever being part of a girl like Gracie’s future.
“You okay?” She comes at me from behind, her hands sliding around my waist, and I close my eyes and try to block out the way they soothe me.
“I’m fine,” I take a deep inhale and turn my body into hers. It hurts that I can’t change the past. That I can’t change who I am for her. “I just forgot that I promised Prez I’d do a job for him tonight. I’m gonna have to head out for a few hours,” I tell her, watching my hand as it slides over her cheek, and how she leans into it so willingly. It’s worrying how affection like this overrules my restraint when I’m around her, it’s even more worrying that I’ve given up trying to fight it.
I leave the cabin hurtin’, a blood thirsty, rage fueled kinda hurt that’s dangerous for anyone who decides to cross me.
“What ya doin’ down here? Thought you’d be busy in ya cabin playing house with that hot piece of ass Prez put ya on,” Tac greets me when I sit at the bar, and I could easily swing for the mother fucker.
I ignore him, nodding to the bitch behind the bar with the pink hair.
“Tequila?” She looks at me sympathetically instead of seductively, like she can read the thoughts in my fucking head and I nod back, tapping my foot impatiently against the leg of the stool I’m sitting on. I take the blunt from Thorne when he offers it to me, hoping it might take some of the edge off. I don’t know why, I gave up on that shit working years ago. Nothing’s ever gonna take the edge off me. That’s the fucking problem.
“You doin’ okay?” Nyx asks a few hours later, coming up from behind me just as I’m about to order another drink.
“I’m doin’ fine,” I snap back at him,
“Prez wants me to handle a collection, you wanna come with?” I was gonna go with Tac but he looks busy. We both look over to the sofas where he’s got his head wedged between a fake pair of tits.
“Sure,” I agree, figuring that anything beats sitting here moping over shit I can’t change. I follow him outside toward one of the cages and something inside me snaps when I see Tommy leaning against his car, a smug as fuck grin on his face as he talks to a fucking hang out.
There’s no mistaking who he belongs to, he’s got the same evil eyes as his old man, he’s just paler, and a lot scrawnier. Tommy’s done a good job of avoiding me around the compound since his uncle Skid gave him a fucking pass. And up to now I’ve let him be, last thing I want is to expose myself to others.
But tonight, this little grunt got me on a bad one and if I can’t make his old man suffer, I guess I’ll have to have a hit at the next best thing.
I march straight over to the little fucker as he opens the car door for the skanky whore he’s with. And he screeches out in shock when I grab him by his scruff and slam the front of his body into the hood.
“Brax, what the fuck?” Tommy’s voice muffles against the hard metal.
“Where’s ya Pappy, Tommy? And think real hard before you bullshit me.”
“I don’t know where he is, I told you guys everything.”
“No. You spoke to Jessie, and Nyx. Now I’m askin’ ya. Where is he?”
“I don’t know where he is. I swear.” The piece of shit sounds scared. He should be. Doesn’t matter what’s in the kid’s blood, he’d never have made the cut.
To be a Soul, you gotta be fearless.
“I call bull shit.” I take my knife from my back pocket, holding it steady under his chin. And the girl who's watching in horror takes off running back into the bar.
“You won’t hurt me.” Tommy trembles like a wet fucking rat. His head shakes while he tries to convince himself of his own words. “Uncle Skid’s orders,” he adds.
“You see your uncle Skid anywhere now?” I ask, tipping my head to one side, and pressing the tip of the knife a little deeper into his flesh.
“I don’t know where my old man is.” His cries become more desperate and it feeds me nothing. I don’t want Tommy’s fear. I want answers.
“I. Don’t. Fuckin. Believe you.” I drop my elbow hard into the back of his neck before I spin him around, taking his throat in my hand and slamming the back of his skull back hard against the hood. I drop the knife from my hand and let my fists take turns smashing into his face and body, and I keep going until I feel blood drip between my fingers. Something strong tugs at my shoulders, and I take a swing behind me. One that Nyx manages to duck out the way of just in time.
“Get out of here, you piece of shit,” he yells at Tommy, before grabbing both my shoulders and throwing me in to the wall.
“What the fuck was that? You know Prez’s orders about Tommy. He knows jack shit. Me and Jessie made sure of it.” I shove my brother off me and start heading toward my bike.
