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Hell knows why.
And it doesn’t matter how much that thought suffocates me. I ain’t going nowhere.
I wake up smelling leather and cigarettes, with Grimm's arms wrapped around my body. He must have fallen asleep sitting up with his back propped against the headboard, and I can tell he’s not awake yet by the way his chest is lifting my head up and down, his heart beating steady against my ear.
I’m frustrated that I can’t see his face. But I don’t want to risk waking him, not while he’s so peaceful and making me feel protected.
“I got to go.” His panicked voice startles me awake. I must have drifted back to sleep. Sitting up, I take a look over my shoulder, and Grimm’s eyes dart wildly at the space around us before he leaps off the bed, running his hands through his hair.
“You were… you had a…” he starts explaining like he’s just been found guilty of something sinful. I can’t help but find his embarrassment amusing.
“I know.” Shifting up on my knees, I shuffle closer to the edge of the bed where he’s standing. He doesn’t move, just stares back at me with those cold, dark eyes.
I bring my face closer to his so our noses are almost touching, and he closes his eyes and breathes me in.
I want him to kiss me, I want him to give in to whatever’s holding him back.
“I gotta go.” He rushes out the door and I let my body flop back onto the mattress.
It’s the same every time with him, just when we start to make progress, he has to pull a little more out of my reach.
Seeing the men in the picture Maddy showed me yesterday stirred up memories, ones that I've spent a lot of time trying to forget. Last night, I let those memories defeat me. And now I’ve woken up hungry for their blood.
I don’t have time for those kinda thoughts today though. Today I’m gonna do something a little different, and it’s gonna require all my patience…
“Hi.” I smile sweetly at Jessie’s old lady when she opens the door of their cabin.
Maddy looks a little shocked to see me, but she soon covers it up with a welcoming smile.
“Come on in.” She steps out of the way so I can pass and when I take a look around the cabin, I realize how different it is to Grimm's place. The layout is the same, but here it’s much cozier.
“You thought any more about those pictures?” she asks, making her way over to the coffee machine and taking two mugs from the cupboard above it.
“They don’t matter.” The lie rolls easily off my tongue.
I’m not here about the fucking pictures.
“Rogue, if those men knew where Eddie went that day, they might come after you.”
“Oh, I'm counting on it,” I blurt out, immediately regretting my words when I note Maddy’s confusion.
“I need to borrow some clothes.” I quickly change the subject, mimicking one of her friendly smiles. I’ve been studying her movements for a few days now, paying close attention to her body language and the different types of smiles she uses for different situations.
“What sort of clothes?” Handing over a mug of steaming coffee, the confusion remains stuck to her innocent-looking face.
‘Something…” I glance over the colorful dress she’s wearing, “…pretty.” I settle on a word I think politely describes her dress sense.
“Is it for a special occasion? Because Jessie says you’re not supposed to leave the club without someone with you. I don’t want you to get in any trouble.” I can tell that her confusion has quickly turned into suspicion and I’m gonna have to up my game.
“Relax, I just want to try out a few new styles. You know, make a change from the overalls and jeans.” I shock myself at how genuine I manage to make myself sound.
“Follow me then.” Maddy’s mood flips to excitement as she grabs my hand and tugs me toward her bedroom. The prospect of styling me up must be too tempting for her to resist.
I’ll bet she was one of those girls that wasted hours playing with dolls when she was younger.
I spend the best part of half an hour going through her wardrobe and shoe collection. A lot of it is the same kinda shit. Pastel colors and floral prints, and eventually I find something tolerable. A denim dress with spaghetti straps.
As it can still get ‘a little chilly’ out, she suggests I wear a button-up sweater on top, which I figure will do a good job at hiding my tattoos, they don’t exactly match the image I’m trying to portray.
