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“It doesn’t matter where you're going, what matters is that you’re going to look fabulous.” Claude places the hat on his head and gets up from the chair he’s lounged across.
I've learned, from spending the day with him, that Claude and Raoul’s sister, Violette, are best friends, and as I kick off my shoes and relax back on the couch, I’m grateful that I’ve had him as a distraction today. I’m still worried about the fact I agreed to stay here. Mama always told me that life was too short for regrets, and I know I would regret saying no to what Raoul is offering me. I just have to keep myself grounded and remind myself that all this is only temporary.
“So you and Raoul, you have a history?” Claude asks, rooting out the gold dress he’s talking about from one of the bags, then he tosses it on my lap before sitting next to me. I've managed to tactfully avoid the me and Raoul conversation all day by asking Claude questions about himself.
“No, not really, we were just kids when we knew each other.”
“You're not kids now.” He nudges me with his shoulder.
“No, we’re not,” I agree, sliding my hands over the sequins on the dress as that heavy feeling sinks back into the pit of my stomach, the one that makes me want to run out the front door and save myself all the heartache.
“Look, I gotta go, I’m heading out tonight myself.” Claude kisses me on both my cheeks before getting up. “Call me.” He winks.
“See ya later, big daddy,” he shouts out to Ludo, before heading back out to Rhett's waiting driver.
I sit in silence, among what has to be thousands of dollars’ worth of clothes, and blow out a long breath.
What the fuck am I doing? Raoul not being here makes it so much easier for me to focus.
Why would I set myself up for this? And all for something that can only last for a few weeks. My cell phone starts ringing, I expect it will be Fabian again, he called nonstop while I was shopping with Claude and I haven’t had the nerve to answer. Not after what happened this morning. But after checking and seeing that it’s Kendra, I answer straight away.
“Where the hell are you?” she asks, sounding furious.
“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” I sigh, opening up one of the boxes of lingerie. Claude insisted I get a set in each color when I couldn’t decide which I preferred.
“I had Fabian calling me all night. He’s worried about you. I didn’t know if I had to cover for you or not, and then when you started ignoring my calls too, I got so worried I almost called your mother.”
“You didn’t though, right?” I check, that really is the last thing I need right now.
“No. But you should have answered. Where are you? Are you okay?”
“I’m at Raoul Burlusconi’s place,” I admit, immediately holding the phone away from my ear when she squeals.
“All respect to you, Evelyn Lane. When you decide to upgrade, you really do go all out. I’m not even mad at you anymore. I just need the deets. Did you fuck him?”
“Ken, I… it’s real complicated.”
“Oh no, you do not get to hit me with it’s complicated. I saw how you reacted the other night, and hell, I’ve seen the man. You are going to tell me everything.” She pauses to take a breath. “What happened with you and Fabian?”
“Me and Fabian are over, he did something real shitty that I don’t want to get into right now. How about we meet for lunch tomorrow before I meet my client at the studio, and I’ll give you the low down,” I suggest. I’m exhausted and really want to try and get some rest before Raoul comes home. I have no idea what he has planned for tonight, I’ll need to be ready for anything.
“Cruel and totally unfair, but I’ll take it. I’ll meet you at our usual place at 12, and you're not getting off lightly, I want to know everything,” she warns me, before we say our goodbyes and hang up.
I really should take all these clothes upstairs and put them away, but I have no idea where Raoul would want me to put them. I decide to leave them where they are until I can ask him, and make my way up the stairs. This time heading for the master bedroom instead of the one where we slept together last night.
His room is almost identical to the other one, only it’s bigger and smells like him. I climb on top of his bed and rest my head on one of the pillows, wondering which side of the bed is his. And I want to cry when I remember that the opposite side will soon be hers.
Briella Quinn is a nice girl, her and father came to stay with the Burlusconis a few times while Raoul was in Sicily. She was beautiful then, and I'm sure she’s beautiful now. It’s wrong of me to feel jealousy toward her because, in reality, Raoul has never been mine. He’s always been promised to her.
Back then, I was foolish and hopeful. I thought Raoul would figure a way for us to be together, but as the years passed and I discovered more and more about the family my father died for, I learned that, for them, family and reputation come before anything.
And that remains the same. I close my eyes and try to get some rest, trying not to imagine how I’m going to feel when it’s time for Raoul to fulfill his responsibility to his family.
