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Levi was kind to me, constantly engaging me in conversation and concerned for my well-being. He didn’t like how I was more of an adult than my mom, but he admired me for taking care of the apartment and her. He was so…nice, and I lapped up any attention he threw my way. Maybe I craved it because I got none from my mom—she’s too absorbed with herself to spare me any consideration. Or perhaps I just liked the attention from Levi because it came from him specifically.
If I’m honest, I always found Levi cute. With his warm brown eyes and perfectly styled brown hair, he reminded me of one of those Abercrombie & Fitch models with his soft, pretty-boy looks. He wasn’t like anyone I’d known—not that I knew many people.
Levi had a way of putting my nerves at ease, promising never to reveal anything I told him to anyone. At first, I hesitated to tell him anything—he was my mom’s boyfriend, after all. It wasn’t until after Levi confided his contempt for my mom’s treatment of me, I opened up about my feelings toward her. We bonded over our shared irritation of her, keeping each other’s secrets safe.
Perhaps that’s why I never sensed the danger lurking behind the handsome face—he was a smooth talker. I was too greedy for any form of comfort that I let the devil settle in my heart.
When Levi began spending more time with me, I didn’t understand what he was doing was wrong. I welcomed his attention, enjoying being taken care of by someone so attentive. Levi would come to my room after my mom would pass out drunk, claiming he wanted to check on me and make sure I was comfortable. Conversations went late into the night, with us bonding over a shared interest in music and books. Goodnight hugs became longer, tighter. Hugging led to cuddling. Cuddling led to my first kiss.
It wasn’t until Levi demanded we do physical things beyond making out that I became uncomfortable with our relationship. But by then, I was in too deep.
Levi was careful not to leave visible marks, but the damage wasn’t on my skin. It was internal, affecting my body and mind. For someone who wears her emotions on her sleeves, my depression was more visible than any bruise.
My grades slipped, only adding to my anxiety. I went from a smart, shy girl to a failing, downhearted one. Many teachers asked if everything was okay at home, but of course, I lied, saying everything was fine. The school knew my mom was a drunk, and I think they assumed my problems revolved around her. My favorite teacher—my culinary instructor—tried to get me to open up. But I couldn’t, fearing the outcome of my confession.
Deep down, I knew what Levi was doing was wrong, but I assumed it was my fault for not stopping it. Levi was becoming more aggressive each time he had his way with me. I wanted the nightmare to end, but I didn’t know how to make it stop.
After a harsh sexual interaction last night, I find myself at a crossroads. Stay or leave.
What do I do? Do I say something to my mom?
Has she ever helped you before?
No, she won’t turn on Levi. He’s her saving grace. She may even see it as some cheap kick.
Maybe I should call the police.
Who am I kidding? Levi’s very convincing—it would be his word against mine. He’s an adult, a recent inductee in the Federal Bureau of Investigation, and takes care of my mom, despite her addiction. I’m a seventeen-year-old kid with failing grades. Levi could spin the whole scenario. Claim I came on to him. I have no proof of what he’s done to me, not even a scratch.
Think, Olina.There has to be a way out of this.
The more I rack my brain, the more nauseous I become. I wrap my arms around my midsection, trying hard to keep myself from falling to pieces. I’m not sure what’s worse, the humiliation that’ll come when the town finds out or continuing to let a man violate me who I once thought cherished me.
It’s both. Both will destroy me. I could barely hold my head up before I became Levi’s victim. How am I going to go anywhere with everyone’s eyes on me?
No. I can’t do it.
Accepting my fate, I realize there’s only one option. I have to leave this town, get as far as I can, and not look back. I have to plan my escape.
My heart thumps wildly against my ribcage as I press my ear to the wall, waiting to hear the television turn on. I can’t start packing until she and Levi are preoccupied, or else he might hear me. If I make too much noise, Levi will come to investigate.
That would be a catastrophe. Mom couldn’t care less if I disappeared. But Levi…Levi won’t let me go. He’s the monster that comes out at night, entering my bedroom to have his way with me—he wants me to remain trapped with him.
Tears fill my eyes as my mind wanders to all the things I wish I could forget. The memories are the worst part because no matter what I do, I cannot escape them. I hate it so much, wishing I could shed my skin and start anew.
Quietly, I wait, listening for my cue to move. I spring into action as soon as I hear the gavel on one of her drama law shows. Under my bed, I pull out my duffel bag. I pack only essentials and my toiletries. Unsure what I all need, I grab my birth certificate and social security card because I’ve needed them before when applying for summer jobs.
My cash supply is minimal, but it will be enough to grab a bus ticket out of town. I struggle with letting go of some sentimental items like photos and books. In the end, a few pictures from my childhood are all I take. It’s sad how my life is reduced to one bag, but it is what it is.
Before I leave, I place my cell on the nightstand. I’ve learned through all the crime shows Shelly watches you can track a cell. I’m not going through all of this just for Levi to find me.
There’s no reason to take a last look at my childhood room since there are no wonderful memories to remember, only pain.
Slowly, I raise my window, tossing my bag out before climbing through. I drop to the ground and grab my stuff. As soon as my feet touch the earth, I am running. I don’t stop. And I don’t look back.
CHAPTERTWO
OPAL
