AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“What did I do to deserve your love?”
There are no words that can make up for what I witnessed in the kitchen. Being drunk is not an excuse for his behavior. Instead of answering, I remain silent as I brush his hair away from his clammy face.
“I don’t deserve you,” he murmurs as he drifts off, leaving me to watch over him the rest of the night with a bleeding heart.
CHAPTERTWENTY-NINE
GAUGE
June 2020
The morning comes faster than I would have liked. My eyes are caked with sleep, my mouth feels dryer than a desert, and my head pounds with a bass louder than damn techno.
Fuck, that was a rough night. My memory is fuzzy after Brass hauled me to bed, but I recall Opal taking care of me more than once throughout the night as the alcohol warred with my guts. At one point, she climbed into the shower to help clean me. I sloppily tried to pull her into my arms, but she batted my hands away as she bathed me.
Funny, I don’t recall her sleeping next to me in the bed. Did she stay up all night watching over me?
That thought has me sitting upright, wanting to find her.Whoa!My equilibrium hasn’t quite sobered yet.
I’m half-awake when Opal comes into the bedroom, freshly showered, dewy as spring rain.
Fuck me sideways. She’s beautiful. Ethereal and good. All reasons why I’m wrong for her.
Opal ignores me, as she pulls out some clothes from the dresser and hastily dresses with the towel still wrapped around herself. I scan the room, confused why she’s hiding her body from me when my brothers have already left for the diner where we eat most mornings.
And then I remember why.
Candy.
Opal is giving me the cold shoulder. I’d been unnecessarily harsh upon my return home. I’m just so screwed up in the head, torn by doing what’s right by Opal and what I desperately want for myself. My mind thinks it has it all figured out, but then I see her, and it all goes out the window, my baser instincts winning out.
When she ran out of the rental and jumped into my arms…Damn.
Damn it all, because I didn’t care at that moment if I was a sick bastard. I had her, really had her—her heart in the palm of my hand.
Then reality settled back in. Using the excuse to put shit away was all I could come up with. Like a prick, I turned my frustration on her, like it’s somehow her fault that I can’t let her go. It was a dick move, and I said shitty things on purpose to make her back off. To bury my guilt, I drank in excess. Thoroughly drunk and missing Opal, I sought her out. Candy followed, helping me as I tripped in the kitchen. There’s no way it looked good when Opal stumbled upon us.
Disgusted, I run a hand over my face. I should say something, apologize and explain what happened.
Before I can get the right words out of my mouth, Opal says, “You should get ready. The crew expects us at the diner for breakfast.”
Wordlessly and embarrassed, I dress and brush my teeth. Opal leads the way out of the rental as I follow. My hands itch to reach out and take her hand, but I fight my urges.
In the front yard, Opal looks around at my brothers, like she’s debating something. I already know she’s trying to decide who to ask for a ride. Fuming, I watch her take the first steps toward Flay.
The hell she is.I catch her retreating figure, guiding her gently by the elbow toward my hog. I may be an asshole who doesn’t deserve her, but I won’t tolerate her riding on the back of my brothers’ bikes, especially one who I suspect is sweet on her.
Stiffly, she climbs behind me, muttering to herself. Instead of holding onto me, she grabs the bitch bars on the back. Pisses me off, but I deserve it.
At the diner, Opal makes a beeline for Ebony and Punk’s table. It isn’t right and I’m not happy with her choice. We always eat together. I guess she needs some distance from my pathetic ass. Begrudgingly, I take a seat at the diner’s bar next to Chase.
“Trouble in paradise?” Chase jabs, shoving a mouthful of eggs into his mouth.
“Fuck off,” I mumble around my coffee, wishing I was drinking an espresso with Opal at the local café she adores. This sludge is awful in comparison, but it’s what’s available.
“You pull any more shit like last night and you could lose her,” Chase continues, ignoring my anger. “A good woman will not tolerate being stomped over.”
Advice from yet another brother who has no woman in his life. I’m sick of hearing their unsolicited bullshit. “I didn’t stomp on her.”
