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She sat on the back patio with a long extension cord, chain smoking while she typed, day after day. When she couldn’t keep her eyes open anymore, she went to bed. She showered erratically and started drinking two pots of coffee a day.
Several weeks later, she connected the laptop to the printer in the De La Cruz home office. Carrying the thick stack of paper with her to her room, she crashed for almost a full day.
Leo checked on her later that night and saw the pages on her dresser. Frowning, he picked it up. It was titled A Manifesto to My Weaker Self.
Flipping to the first page, his eyes widened at the rage Amelia expressed at herself. One line after another filled with vitriol about her ignorance, her cowardice, and her refusal to rock the boat with her mother before Augusta had Amelia’s baby ripped from her body.
Leo didn’t know how to bridge the painful gap that was opening between them. His heart ached for her and his soul called out for her.
Only his strong belief that his love would be enough to pull her through kept him from giving in to despair.
His mother advised patience and Leo tried to be strong.
Augusta was tried for kidnapping and assault, among other things. Amelia didn’t attend the trial but insisted on going the day her mother was sentenced.
Gil sat in the back of the courtroom and started to cry when Amelia entered and took a seat.
When the judge announced that Augusta Whitehall would serve three years, Amelia started to laugh.
Augusta’s head whipped around. “Amy! I’m sorry, Amy!”
Amelia continued to laugh as she left the courtroom with Leo at her side. By the time she made it to the SUV, Leo was carrying her. Her laughter had devolved into wracking sobs that made it difficult for her to breathe.
She passed out in Leo’s arms in the backseat and he tucked her into her bed when they got to the house. It was as if a knot of stress had left her body all at once. She slept fully around the clock.
Leo woke at three o’clock in the morning to Amelia riding him. His heart soared at the sight of her. She looked like herself for the first time in two months.
He lifted at the waist and held her to his chest, touching her, loving her, everywhere. “Amelia…”
He suddenly realized he wasn’t wearing a condom and started to pull her away on instinct to get one.
Cupping the side of his neck, she told him sadly, “There’s no need for it now, Leo. We’ve only been with each other.”
He stroked her face and hair. “I’m sorry, Amelia. We can still be happy - deliriously happy - while we do the things we’ve always dreamed about. I’ll put everything I have into making your life all that you want it to be. You’re everything to me, Amelia. I belong to you.”
She never paused in her movements above him. When she spoke, her voice was clearer than he’d heard it in months. Still, her question confused him.
“Leo, why haven’t you left for college? You should have already been settled in your dorm for summer session. You always talked about getting a head start.”
“I wanted to be sure you were okay to travel, Amelia. We have to find an apartment. When you’re ready, we can fly to Boston and scope out places to live. I’ll start school in January. When I explained the circumstances, the dean was glad to give me the time I needed.”
Amelia placed her palms on either side of his face, “You give up too much for me, Leo. Again and again you do it. One day you’ll have nothing left. You care for me, protect me, rescue me over and over. I’ve become dependent on you to be stable. To help me get through one bad situation after another. When does it end? When is it your turn?”
“You give me so much, Amelia. I don’t know why you can’t see that.” He rolled her to her back and braced her with his hands on her shoulders. “I will love you through this. We can get through it together. We can do anything as long as we’re together.”
He made love to her for a long time. Only when the second orgasm crashed over her, when she was limp beneath him, did he allow himself to come. He held her to his heart, whispered about his love, as their bodies returned to earth.
Leo fell asleep on top of her and woke to roll them to their sides. He spooned the back of her body and buried his face in her hair.
The feel of her cradled in his arms went a long way toward healing the bleeding wounds inside him.
“I love you. Thank you for coming to me, Amelia. Everything is going to be okay now.” Despite fighting it, Leo drifted back to sleep. “My Amelia.”
“I love you, too. More than you know, Leo.”
When the sun came up, he was in bed alone. Blinking, he saw a letter on the pillow beside him.
With dread, he reached out to pick it up. His name was on the front of the envelope in her bubbled handwriting. His hands shook violently as he tried to pull the page from inside.
