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“I love you, Nina. I love you and I’ll fight for you. I’ll fight for anyone or anything you care about. I won’t walk away. I won’t let you down, and I’ll never take you for granted.”
For the first time in her memory, her tears weren’t silent. She gasped for air as his body moved on her, in her. She tried to stop the low, keening wail she made but couldn’t.
“I’ll love you every minute I have left of my life and I’m going to make you stronger - inside and out. I won’t leave you, Nina. You won’t be alone. I won’t judge you - not for mistakes you made in your past or the ones you make in your future. I give you my word, sweetheart. Believe in me and I’ll always believe in you.”
She wrapped her arms around him and cried against his neck. She came with a painful cry but he didn’t stop moving.
“You arebeautiful, Nina - stunning and bright and brilliant - from your body to your heart to your clever mind. I want the strongest female, the fastest. The one who has unfailing instincts honed by pain. It has to be you. For me, no one else will ever compare.”
“I-I love you, James.”
He stilled, lifted his head, and smiled. Softly, he said, “That didn’t take nearly as long as I thought it would.” He kissed her for a long time and started to move again. “My body craves yours. My mind is thrilled by you. My heart hurts when you hurt...so I’m going to stand in front of the pain every chance I get. You won’t regret loving me, Nina.”
Cupping his face, she whispered, “I’m afraid when I have something to lose. Rowan…”
“If you were to ask Rowan right now if she’d trade the pain of losing Bennett for never meeting him, she’d refuse. She hurts now, Nina...but being loved is worth the risk.”
He kissed her gently, his tongue coiling with hers, and rested his forehead against hers when he broke it.
“We’re going to face the world together, hand in hand, and when you’re ready to admit to me how badly, how desperately, you want to be a mother, I’ll move mountains to make that happen for you.”
For hours, he made love to her, held her, promised her a future she never would have imagined having.
All her life, Nina had tallied her sins, paid the price when she committed them, and lashed herself repeatedly for being weak or stupid. She imagined her soul as dark and tainted.
James made her feel clean.
Chapter Eighteen
Nina spent the next months insisting that James keep their relationship secret until Rowan’s baby came.
“I...need her to have someone to love, to keep close, before I can share this with her.”
“Nina…”
“It’s cruel, James. Cruel of me when she’s still grieving Bennett and fighting what she feels for Gage. I won’t hurt her again. Holding her child in her arms will comfort her.”
Nina moved into the room she once shared with Rowan at Miss Jeffries’ place and never told Rowan she’d been living in Austin since before Bennett died.
Once the elderly woman was back on her feet, she was forced to take it slow to allow her body to heal. That meant Nina spent a lot of time taking care of Ava and Emma.
She didn’t consider it a hardship.
Sitting with the sisters at the little kitchen table, she said, “You’re going to spend the day with Miss Ally…”
“No, Nina!”
“You’re our best friend!”
“No one plays make-believe like you!”
“You do the best voices!”
“You two areshamelessat piling on the compliments but Rowan has her doctor’s appointment today and she asked me to go with her. When a pregnant lady asks a favor, you do it so the baby stays calm and steady.”
The girls sniffed and Nina fought not to laugh.
“Fine.”
