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The pink color in her cheeks flared and spread across her whole face as she quickly turned away and busied herself with something in the file cabinet.
The sight immediately had my mind wandering, trying to picture Joanne in bed. Was she thinking along the same lines? Was that what was making her blush? Was that a good sign?
Jesus. Why was I sonervous?
“Pretty well, thanks,” she said, a faint smile playing across her lips as her eyes darted in my direction for a moment before going back to the file cabinet. “And you?”
“Um, not really. Sort of. Well… no, actually.”
Joanne turned to face me, cocking her head to the side as she waited for me to continue.
Okay, so maybe the think-before-speaking thing wasn’t working out so well.
Surprise, surprise.
Whatever, though. I wasn’t used to mincing words, and I wasn’t going to start now. I’d just have to do my best to say exactly what I meant and hope that it was sensitive enough that Joanne would still want to talk to me when it was over.
“Okay, look.”
I paused for a moment when she raised her eyebrows, wondering if my tone had maybe been too harsh. Too late now, though. I’d already taken the plunge. All that was left was to keep going.
“There’s something I need to get off my chest. I’m, uh… not the best with stuff like this. With emotions.”
I stopped again when she smiled, wondering what to make of it. At least it wasn’t a frown. Or, God forbid, tears.
“I’m listening,” Joanne said, still grinning. “Go on.”
“Right. So, in the NFL, if there’s a problem, you just sort of put it out there and deal with it—you know, just sort of get over it as quickly as possible, for team cohesion and all that. And I feel like this is something that could potentially affect our team here at the shop. I know this is nothing like the NFL, but I’d like to think we could have those same sorts of open, honest conversations. Do you follow?”
I had suspected that I’d started to ramble a little, and that suspicion was confirmed when the smile vanished from her face and her brows furrowed, a tiny crease appearing in the middle of her forehead.
Shit.
“Are you saying there’s a problem?” Her voice was quiet and uncertain, and she was looking more and more apprehensive with each second that passed. “A problem with… me?”
“No, not at all. Not like that, I mean. It’s a problem with me, maybe?” I shook my head. What in the hell was I even saying? “Or maybe it’s not a problem at all.”
“Okay,” Joanne nibbled at her lip. “I guess I don’t follow, then.”
I couldn’t blame her. I wasn’t even sure ifIknew what I was talking about at that point. But there wasn’t any yelling yet, and neither one of us was crying, so… maybe that was still a good sign?
One thing was for certain, though. I was in a hole, and I needed to stop digging.
“Let me just be blunt,” I said, falling back on the only thing I really knew how to do.
I’d failed at being subtle, and I’d failed at prepping Joanne—and myself—for possible bad news. Blunt was really all I had left.
“Did you like that kiss yesterday?”
Joanne blinked and opened her mouth to speak but closed it again without saying anything. She looked away, then immediately back, catching my gaze again. Her face was quickly flushing red, but she finally nodded, and when she spoke, there was none of the uncertainty from earlier.
“I did. I’m not gonna lie, I liked it a lot. But if you think that’s a problem, I, I—”
“No,” I swallowed hard to keep from breaking into a wide smile. “No, that’s not the problem. There’s no problem. That’s just… great. Really great.”
“O-kay…” she turned to the door. “I’m glad we got that out of the way. But if there’s nothing else…” she paused and raised an inquisitive eyebrow. “I think I’m gonna run next door and grab a couple of coffees?”
“No, wait,” I stood up, as if I was going to follow Joanne out the door, then stopped myself. “Please. There, um,issomething else.”
