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“Okay, okay, let me see if I got this right?” I wait for him to look over at me before I continue so I know he’s actually listening.
“So you realized that you like having Jade around?” I ask, figuring I would start simply.
He gives me the slightest nod of his head, but it’s enough for me, so I continue.
“And because of rumors and my friendship with her, you wanted to bring the information to me.”
Again he nods.
“Why?” I ask, the confusion clear in my voice.
“I needed to know if you two were pursuing a relationship.” He answers as if it’s obvious.
I assure you it was not.
“Okay, but we aren’t, so the rumors are wrong.” I tell him simply because while I might like Jade, the truth is she’s not mine. We’ve fooled around a bit, but we haven’t labeled anything, and I wouldn’t ask her to. She’s free to be with whoever she wants.
“What?” He asks, and this time it’s his turn to look confused. “But then, why were you so mad just a moment ago?”
I laugh. I can’t help it. Leave it to Rick to completely misunderstand something so simple by overthinking.
“I wasn’t mad. I was excited that I was right.” I shake my head in disbelief.
“Okay. Let me spell it out for us both, so we're on the same page here.” I say when I finally get a hold of myself again.
“Jade and I are friends. We have fucked around a bit, but there's no label, and I don’t want to push for one. I just want her to be happy, and if she’s happy with me, that's cool. If she’s happy with you, that's cool too.” I shrug before touching on his earlier topic. “If she wants to be with all of us, that's fine with me too. We’ve always shared everything. I don't think it would be that crazy to share a girl. And I get the feeling Jade will be more than enough to keep us all busy.”
Rick is quiet as he processes what I just said, but I’m not done yet.
“So, really, it comes down to what you want,” I tell him on a more serious note. “If you're cool with her making the choice, nothing has to change. If you want her to yourself, you’ll have to talk to her and see what she wants, or you can step aside and do nothing like you just seemed like you were cool with.” He looks like he wants to protest that last part, but I hold up my hand to stop him.
To my surprise, he remains quiet. It’s not often that I’m this serious, and I’m grateful that he seems to understand that and respect it.
“But let me make one thing perfectly clear. I like Jade. Hell, I think I could love her if I let myself.” I say it like an offhand comment but even saying it as a possibility out loud has my heartbeat hammering in my chest. I know I could love her. I’m pretty sure I already do, but I don’t think she’s ready for that, and I’m more than happy to wait forever if she needs me to.
I swallow past the lump in my throat at using the L word and keep going. I need Rick to understand where I’m coming from for this to have any chance of not blowing up in our faces later.
“So, unless she specifically tells me she’s not interested, I won’t be going anywhere, and even if she isn’t interested, I will still be here for her. Jade’s given up enough, and I won’t let us make her lose more over stupid shit like us being jealous of each other. We aren’t in control of her, and I’ll be damned if anyone tries to act like they are. You want her, fine. You, me, Kratos, Trent, hell Spencer can pursue her if he wants to get his head out of his ass. I don't care. But this is her choice, and we will all respect it no matter what.”
His eyes narrow at the mention of Trent, but he doesn’t say anything against it, even though I’m pretty sure he wants to. He might not like Trent because of our own personal shit, but we both know he’s a good guy. Probably better for her than we are, if I’m being honest.
If I weren’t in so deep with her already, I would encourage her to be with him. It would be easier and safer, and she would be happy. He would make sure of it. Call it selfish or fucked up, but whatever it is, I don’t care. I’ll be here until she tells me she doesn't want me. Even then, I’m not sure I’ll be able to let her go, but I’ll try if that's what she needs from me. That's more effort than I’ve ever put in for a girl in my life, more effort than I’ve ever put in for anyone but the guys, putting her needs and wants above my own.
“If we can all agree to that, we should be just fine, and anyone who can’t, well, they can fuck off.” I tell him in complete seriousness.
He looks at me for a moment, and I can damn near hear the gears working in his head as he thinks about what I just said. Then, finally, after a minute of silence, he nods, and I can see his decision in his eyes, his determination, even before he replies.
“I agree. Jade should be allowed to choose.” He says simply. Now we just have to talk to everyone else and ensure we're all on the same page.
“I’ll talk to Kratos about it when I go to the club tomorrow.” He says as if he can read my mind.
“I can probably mention it to Trent when I meet him at the garage. I doubt he will be down for it, but who knows.” I say with a shrug, grabbing my phone to check the time. Trent is more traditional and by the rules than we are, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen him look at anyone like he does Jade.
Shit, now I’m late.
I grab my water bottle and head toward the door in a bit of a rush.
“I’ll let you handle Spencer while you're at it.” I shout over my shoulder as I cross the threshold into the garage. I hear him sigh just before the door closes behind me and can’t help but smile at the thought of how that conversation will go down.
