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She grabs my free hand. “Undo the rest.”
“No. Are you crazy?” I whisper angrily, and she licks her lips, sending me into some sort of frenzy like a hungry shark smelling blood.
She shakes her head. “No, but you just proved my point.”
“This proves nothing.”
“You’re nice.” She grins.
I grimace. “No, I’m not.”
“Yes, you are.” She’s taunting me now.
“No, I’m not, Esperanza.”
“Then prove it, Adrik.” I look down at her slightly exposed chest then back to her lips as she whispers again, “Prove it.”
20
ESPIE
It’s a mystery why I’ve gotten so bold– why I don’t just stop right now and go right back to bed. Maybe it’s because I want to prove a point; That Adrik is good and proper, and he wouldn’t do anything I don’t want him to. But then again, I do want him to do something to me, and this is certainly not proper.
Ever since this afternoon, his hands on my body is predominantly what I’ve been thinking about. Every time we’ve gotten close, I’ve wanted to give into this magnetic pull between us that raises chills over my skin. The kind that long for only one thing, and I don’t think I’ve ever felt that before. Not until him.
So, I’m standing inches from his shocked frame, hand lingering on my exposed chest, the other clutching his reluctant one.
If I’m right, then I win this, and that’s good— though I want more than I should from him, more than what I’m allowed. But if I’m wrong, and he takes me now, I’m not sure who wins. That part is muddied by longing so lengthy and deep it could span the entire ocean twice and still not be enough to cover its breadth.
“Esperanza…” he whispers when I pull his hand closer, and then without little effort on my part, he presses his cold fingertips to my chest, running them down after I let go. Down to the next button and over the chills he’s causing.
I slowly look back up into his blue eyes, nearly glowing in the moonlight that seems brighter tonight, reflecting off every shimmering snow-covered surface in sight. A breath escapes me as he tugs at the button, and it clouds the space between us with a semblance of warmth. And though the frigid air is harsh and sharp on my exposed skin, I’ll freeze before he backs away now.
“You don’t want this.” He shakes his head.
“I do.”
“No, you’re testing me.”
I don’t deny his words, reluctance swaying his tone a little. I swallow hard, forcing the nerves back down in my throat and the thoughts that I will not think because if I do, I’ll remember why this can’t happen; Why I should back down now and run back to the theater before anything transpires, but I can’t.
Just like the temperature, I’m frozen. Beauty begging for the Beast to do the impossible. To care enough not to turn me away simply because he likes the look in my eyes when he hurts me. But the way he is staring at me now, makes me wonder if that’s still true, if he still enjoys making me angry, breaking my heart, pushing me away until we’re on either sides of a steel curtain.
“I can’t, we should—“
“Okay.” I pull away, turning towards the door, but he grabs my arm, pulling me back to him until we collide with a thud. His hands are in my hair and his eager lips are crashing into mine, and every other thought besides‘I need you, now’is lost to the loudness of purse lust.
How have I gone my entire life without this, without being touched this way, wanted this way? Somehow we make it inside, hands clawing at one another, and I mean all four of our hands. I’m grabbing his sweater, pulling it off as he rips open my top. He takes a second to look at my breasts, bare because I haven’t bothered to put on a bra.
For a moment I feel vulnerable, his hands tracing my collar bone as he looks at them, and then he grabs them, kissing down my neck and right down to my nipples. I throw my head back as he licks them, kissing down my torso before rising to my lips again.
I cling to him, wanting so badly for him to continue touching me everywhere, nothing is enough, yet everything is significant. He kisses down my neck and I feel his approval of me with every touch. It feels wonderful— his skin on mine and his desire for my body, equal to mine for his.
“Fuck.” He whispers into my skin when I absentmindedly grind up against his cock. Where has this side of me been? How does it exist?
He grabs my hips to guide me in a steady motion as he pulls me to the rug in the center of the room. When he’s on his knees, pulling down my pajama bottoms to reveal my bare skin and exposed heat, he kisses it, guiding me over his shoulders as I tangle my fingers in his choppy black hair to stay myself. Unexpectedly, the tip of his tongue is prodding gently at my folds, pushing between them, gliding over my clit the way his fingers did before. The most electrifying current rises from deep within me and I let out a soft moan as he reaches up and steadies me, slowly sliding his hand down my chest and grabbing my breast. I’m not large chested– never have been– and I’ve never been more grateful for it than right now. His entire hand is over both of my breasts, gently rubbing over my aroused nipples as he licks with such precision I’m almost happy he has so much experience.
A flood of arousal, so intense I know I’m close to exploding, fills me. I’m fighting for my breath, watching his blue eyes watch me intently as he continues to lick, to suck, in such a way that I feel like I’m floating away from him. I grab onto him tighter, and I think he slightly grins as I reach my peak. It’s just a guess though because I’m seeing spots as the pleasure consumes me, and I moan his name accidentally. He kisses my pussy as he inserts a finger into me, grabbing my back and gently laying me on it.
