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“Thanks, Lori,” she whispered, looking like her frosty mask was about to crack.
“If I hug you, will you kill me?” Mav asked.
“Maybe, but you can try,” she replied as Mav wrapped his arms around her and I didn’t think any of us missed how they both let out a contented sigh as they melted into each other.
Frankie
“Tellmeaboutwhereyou live. Where’s home, Bear?”
“I sold my house when Emma and Alfie died and I bought a tiny, one bedroom apartment. I didn’t want a place that felt like home because I was trying to punish myself. When I got the job with you guys, it seemed to be the answer to all my problems. You gave me a purpose, a home, and a huge family to surround myself with. I didn’t realize how much I needed pulling from my pit of despair until I went on tour with you guys and remembered what life was like when you lived it instead of just existing in it.”
We were in my bedroom at Mum and Dad’s, laying in my double bed, whispering in the darkness, neither of us able to sleep.
“Where do you want to live?” I asked.
Matt twirled a lock of my hair through his fingers as my head pressed against his chest. “I don’t care as long as it’s with you.”
“What about if we went back to the cabin? Just for a few more weeks, until you have to go back to work?”
“Won’t someone else be using it?”
“Not if I bought it.”
“What?”
“I bought it. I couldn’t stand the thought of someone else in that space. I mean, we had so many good moments there.”
“Until we both nearly drowned.”
“But we didn’t. I love the idea of spending more time there. I love the idea of taking our kids there.”
“Kids?” Matt stiffened.
I pushed myself up, cupping Matt’s startled face. “Shit. Sorry. I didn’t think. I mean, I know we’ve not talked about it, and after Alfie, you might not be ready to think about having more.”
Matt sat up too, pressing his back against the headboard. “I’ve never thought about having more kids, I’ll be honest. I never saw myself having another relationship. You know that. So, kids never even crossed my mind.”
“We don’t need to have this conversation now. I just wanted you to know I see a future in that cabin, with us… with our family. However that looks.”
Matt kissed my forehead. “I want to have this conversation, I just need to—”
“You don’t need to explain, Bear. I get it. There’s no rush. We have a lifetime.”
Matt pulled me into his chest, and we don’t speak again, as he stroked my hair repetitively, sending me into a light sleep. I didn’t know how long we stayed like that, dozing, wrapped around each other when Matt spoke so quietly I thought I was dreaming.
“I think Alfie would love to know he was a big brother.”
I pushed up from his chest so I could look at him. The tears in his eyes were clear, even in the darkness of the room.
“I’m scared, Rogue. What if we lost a baby, or I lost you? I don’t think I could cope.”
I ran my fingers through his beard, following the line of his jaw. “I can’t promise you everything will be fine, but I can promise that we’d go through it all together. You can’t live your life in fear, not doing what you want because you’re too busy wonderingwhat if.”
“I would love you to have our babies. Fuck, the thought of you being pregnant is making me so horny I can’t think straight.” I couldn’t resist edging my finger along the elastic of his boxers. “Rogue, I swear if you touch me, I will come, and then you can explain to Dr. Vaughan if I’m still broken tomorrow. One more night and then, hopefully, we can fuck each other senseless in ourcabin tomorrow.”
I huffed loudly. “Spoilsport.”
“Thank you, by the way.”
