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She tossed her hair back, that pale, distinct hair, and squeezed him tight, and he knew.
“Ariel,” he growled.
And he felt her shudder as he said her name. He felt his entire body arrive in spasms of pleasure. And he had done her a disservice, for he had not yet made her come.
He pushed his hand down between her thighs and thrust hard into her as his orgasm overtook him completely. He roared, and just as he did, he felt her pulse around him. Felt her climax.
And then she collapsed onto the bed, breathing hard.
His wife.
His beautiful wife. It could not be denied and neither could she.
It was Ariel. Only Ariel. His downfall. His muse. His everything.
“Cairo,” she whispered. “Cairo, I love you.”
And everything inside of him went dark.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
THEREWASSOMETHINGpossessed inside of her husband, and Ariel had no idea what it was. But he wasn’t himself.
What even was himself? She didn’t know. She thought that she knew him, but ever since they had returned here... He had been a stranger to her. Not coming to her bed, and then tonight... It was like he was running from demons. And she didn’t know why. She didn’t know what was hurting him so badly. Didn’t know why he was distant, and yet intense all at once. It was like he wanted to draw nearer to her and also pull away forever all at the same time.
She simply couldn’t understand.
“Tell me,” she said. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
But he had still said nothing since she had said that she loved him. He wasn’t speaking at all. He was just sitting there, his breath rising and falling harshly.
“Cairo,” she whispered.
“No,” he denied viciously.
“Cairo, I just want... I love you.”
“You don’t know what you’re speaking of. You know nothing of love. Your father betrayed my family. He would have sold you as well if it suited him. He practically did. He didn’t care what you thought of it, didn’t care what your mother thought. How long would it have taken for him to sell you to the next highest bidder? He did so when he brought you to be engaged to my brother, did he not? What do you know of love? Has anyone in your life ever loved you?”
He spoke to wound. And his words hit their mark.
No, her father had been selfish. Her mother had been passive.
Even though her mother may have loved her, it wasn’t an active sort of love.
It wasn’t a love that helped or healed.
“You say that as if I’ve never thought of it. But of course I have. Of course I’ve wondered if my father ever loved me. Of course I’ve wondered why the bond between myself and my mother was so easily broken. Of course I have. But I do know what love is, Cairo. I have known. Since I was a girl of twelve. Maybe even younger. I have known that it was you. And when you were gone... Well, I couldn’t love anyone else. I tried. I hoped. I was open to it, but it never happened. It never happened because I couldn’t want anybody but you. And it never happened because you formed my concept of what desire was.”
“And that is all it is,” he said. “It’s just sex. Good sex, but sex, nonetheless. It isn’t love, my moon, and it never will be.”
“Why? Because you don’t believe in it? And why is that? What is love if not a sixteen-year pursuit to free your brother? That is love.”
“That is atonement,” he said, the words sounding torn from him.
“What?”
“You heard what I said, do not question it. You require no explanation. You are bound to me, and we do not need to come to an agreement on these things. But you do not need to tell me that you love me. Never again.”
