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She nodded sympathetically.
“I understand.”
“I’m not sure Tor does. I’m worried all the time he’s spending with me is sending the wrong signals, especially after what’s already happened. I’ve seen how people treat the fey and don’t want to be another source of cruelty.”
“It’s sweet of you to worry about him. But you can’t control his hopes, June. You know that, right? Besides, allowing a massage after the beating you took early this morning is hardly sending mixed signals. Every fey watching was wincing on your behalf.”
“If Merdon taught Hannah to fight, does that mean the fey train like that? Now, that’s something I wouldn’t mind spectating.”
A speculative look entered Angel’s eyes.
“You’re full of good ideas. I’m so glad you’re here and can’t wait until Tenacity’s less fey-hostile. We’re going to have so many ways for them to fall in love with the fey.”
“Remember what I said about the love connections.”
She waved away my concern with a sudden wince and a belly rub.
“I think I’m going to go lie down. The freeloader is all knees and elbows this afternoon. I’ll stop by later with the list of names, though.”
“No rush. Take it easy. Growing babies is hard work.” I glanced wistfully at her belly and grabbed my things.
“If you see Shax out there, send him in, okay? I’m ready for my own back rub.”
With a wave goodbye, I let myself out.
The mass of fey gathered in the front yard, their backs toward me, was a bit of a surprise. As soon as they heard the door open, the low rumble of the man speaking stopped, and the fey turned to look at me.
I offered a friendly smile to the group.
“Shax? Angel’s back is hurting her. She’s wondering if you could join her inside.”
The fey parted, revealing Shax. He nodded and strode toward me, along with Tor, as the rest of the fey dispersed.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“You didn’t. We were finished. Are you ready to go home?”
“I am. Thanks for waiting around.”
Relaxed from the massage, I thought of little else but the long soak that I planned to have once we reached Tor’s place. He seemed content with my silence, leaving me to disappear into the master bath in peace.
The lavender-infused water did wonders for my body, but not so much for my mind. Thoughts of Adam crept in, especially his plan to leave for the caves, and I found a certain irony in it all. Adam broke up with me so I wouldn’t worry about him; yet, I couldn’t stop it. I told Tor I wasn’t ready for a boyfriend to prevent him from placing his hopes in a relationship with me; yet, he couldn’t stop what he felt either. Angel was right. We couldn’t control what someone else was feeling. I wondered if that meant Adam felt as guilty about causing me pain as I felt about potentially causing Tor pain.
Mentally cringing away from it all, I sank lower in the steaming water.
While I cared about Adam and knew he continued to care about me, our relationship was forever changed. The sooner I came to terms with that, the better off I would be. However, knowing that didn’t turn off the tumultuous cycle of regrets, doubt, and self-recrimination.
Realizing my mistake in taking a bath, I quickly left the warm water and dried off. I needed to stay busy and keep my mind focused on something productive rather than my three-year failed attempt at a happily-ever-after.
Concentrating on clearing out the bad seeds from Tenacity was a perfect task for me. While it might prove physically dangerous, it was emotionally safer, by far. There were so many moving pieces, but I trusted everyone to do their parts. They wanted the same thing just as badly as I did, though for different reasons.
As soon as I was dressed, I opened the door and almost screamed at the sight of Tor right there in the hall.
“June, you are safe,” he said quickly.
“Sorry,” I said, pressing a hand over my heart. “I startled easily even before the infected showed up. Did you need to get into your bedroom?” As soon as I asked the question, I realized I needed to move my clothes downstairs.
“No. I wanted to tell you I made you something to eat.”
