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I fight to keep my cool. “You can’t make those decisions for me, Alec. I’ll see whoever I want. And for the record, I think it would be gross to have your brother have access to my most private parts.”
“Oh,” he says, suddenly understanding. “I never looked at it like that. I’ll get someone else then.”
“No, you won’t. Molly has already made an appointment for me with her obstetrician. That’s who I’ll see.”
Alec frowns. “What’s his name?”
“Her name. Dr. Felicia Brown.”
“I’ll check her out,” he says. “We need to exchange numbers.” He fishes out his cell phone.
I do the same, and we exchange numbers. Everything about this feels surreal. I’m going to be a mom in a few months, and now, I know the identity of my sperm donor.
“I’ll tell my secretary to put you through anytime, doesn’t matter who I’m with or where I am,” he says.
I remember that he’s a surgeon. “Even when you’re in the operating room?”
“Even then,” Alec says solemnly as he puts his phone away.
A thought crosses my mind. “What made you change your mind about the baby?”
He locks gazes with me. “I didn’t change my mind, but I realized that you would not change yours. The baby is mine, and nothing will change that, and I’m determined to be a present dad. Make the best of a bad situation.”
I cringe at his choice of words. I suppose I should be grateful that I won’t have to explain to my child in the future why I don’t know who her father is.
“How are you doing for money?” Alec says. “I’ll have my accountant set up something so that you are well taken care of.”
“No,” I blurt out. “I’m fine. I got paid an advance by my publishing company. That should tide me over until I get paid again.” I can’t imagine taking money from Alec Anderson. I’d feel like a complete user. No way. I’d rather wait tables than take money from him.
“Fine, but you know it’s there if you want it,” he says.
I feel suddenly exhausted, and I want to go home and lie down. Too much is happening too fast. “Can we leave?”
A look of concern comes over his features. “Sure. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, just a little tired.”
“Yes, the first trimester is exhausting.” He raises his hand and asks for the check. “I’ll take you home right away.”
It does feel good to be taken care of, especially as my body suddenly feels like someone has turned off my energy switch. By the time we get to Alec’s car, I can’t wait to close my eyes, and I do so as soon as I fasten my seatbelt. Bliss. I snuggle in the impossibly comfortable seat and let my eyelids close. The next thing I know, someone is gently shaking me awake.
“Did I fall asleep?” I ask as I rub my eyes. “I don’t know what happened there.”
“It’s okay. Your body is working very hard right now even though you may not feel it.” Alec says.
I rub my belly. My baby is in there. Our baby. “Thanks for lunch.” My voice is still heavy with sleep.
“You’re welcome. Don’t forget to call or text me the details of the obstetrician appointment,” Alec says.
“I will.” I reach for the door.
“Wait.” He turns off the car and hurriedly gets out. He comes to my side and opens the door for me.
“You don’t have to do that.”
“I want to.” He takes my hand and helps me out.
He lets go of my hand, but seconds later, I’m still buzzing from his touch. He walks me to the front door, and all I can think about is how much I want his hand on mine again. I’m pathetic and needy. A deadly combination. I need to lock myself in my house and never leave. I’m an embarrassment to myself.
