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She glances around as if she’s also noticing our surroundings for the first time. It’s a nice thought to think that I might be affecting her how she’s affecting me.
“No, but I’ve heard a lot about it,” she says. “I figured it would be your kind of place.”
“My kind of place?” I raise an eyebrow.
“Yes,” Ivy says, looking at me straight in the eye. “You and I are from different worlds, Alec, and we live very different lives.”
I narrow my eyes as I struggle to understand just what Ivy is saying. I’m about to protest when I remember my first reaction when I went to Ivy’s house, followed weeks later by my parents’ reaction. Shame comes over me. I’ve never thought of myself as a snob, but clearly, I was.
I’ve changed, though. This experience with Ivy has taught me never to judge anyone from first impressions. I shudder to think what would have happened had I followed my brothers’ advice of not reaching out since Ivy would never know the identity of her baby’s sperm donor.
I’d have missed out on meeting Ivy, which would have been a great loss.
“Let’s not spoil dinner by fighting,” I say mildly.
The waiter brings the menus, and for the next couple of minutes, we are engrossed in choosing our meals.
“How was your day?” Ivy asks when the waiter withdraws. “Any major surgeries?”
I’m pleasantly surprised by the question. The last time we went out for dinner, Ivy asked me questions about my work, but I’d figured she was just being polite.
My appetite kicks in when dinner is brought around, and I dig in and eat with gusto. I look up to find Ivy staring at me with amusement.
“I hadn’t realized how hungry I was,” I tell her sheepishly.
“It’s nice to see you enjoying your food,” she says, her eye twinkling.
I take in her smile and the soft look on her face, and it hits me that I’m a goner. I want this woman in my life and not just because she’s carrying my baby. I want to know everything about her. What makes her happy or sad? How do I put a permanent smile on her face?
Fucking hell. I’m in love. I must be. That must be the only reason I’m feeling like a happy fool. I watch Ivy eat as well. I don’t know if I’ve ever enjoyed watching a woman eating. I love the way her mouth moves. A dirty thought sneaks into my mind, and I quickly shoot it down. This is not the time to think of how it would feel to have her kissable lips wrapped around my cock.
Feeling a need to touch her, I stretch my hand across the table and cover her hand with mine. She goes still and watches me. I stroke her skin with my thumb, and we exchange a smile that says more than words can.
“How is your writing going?” I ask her withdrawing my hand.
A solemn expression comes over her features and worry instantly grabs hold of me.
“I sent my editor a few chapters, but she wasn’t impressed,” Ivy says. “She said my hospital scenes are not realistic, and I need to familiarize myself with how a hospital works.” She smiles wryly. “Actually, that’s the reason I asked you out for dinner. I need to ask you for a favor. Ariana, that’s my editor, suggested that I shadow a doctor and get a clear understanding of the workings of a hospital.”
A cold feeling comes over me as if someone has poured ice water over my head. I feel like a complete fool. All along, I thought that something special was happening between us, especially when Ivy asked me out for dinner. I’m a fool. I even fucking thought that I was in love, and she might have feelings for me too. I’d allowed myself to forget the circumstances that brought us into each other’s lives.
Ivy was willing to rent out her womb to pursue her writing. Clearly, she would do anything for her career. That has not changed. She’s still the same person, and her life revolves around her writing. She would never be interested in a relationship, and I’d be a fool to continue fantasizing about her romantically. Disappointment feels like a heavy burden placed on my shoulders.
Women and I just don’t gel, and it’s time I accepted that.
17
Ivy
I sneak a glance at Alec as I drive him home. His face is a mask devoid of any expression of emotion. Something changed at the restaurant, and I don’t know what. I’ve tried to figure out what I might have said to piss him off, but I can’t find it.
He said yes to my request to shadow him at the hospital, but something after that made him change. He’s a mystery. Until that moment, we had been in complete sync, and I felt closer to him than any other man, but after that, he closed off.
I’d hoped that he would invite me in after dinner, but I’m not getting those vibes now. We are both silent on the drive to his place. Instead of being presumptuous and driving to the underground parking lot, I drive the car to the front of the building. I hold my breath and wait for Alec to ask me to drive to the basement.
As I come to a stop, “Thanks for dinner,” he says formally as though we are people who are meeting for the first time. “We’ll see you tomorrow at eight.”
“Yes, sure.” I’m taken aback by Alec’s formality.
