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Darlene was the one who said I should fly first class. I still thought it was a waste of money, but I supposed today her nagging me to get on the precheck list paid off. For all the fighting we did when we were married, at least some good came out of it.
I strode to the gate and made it to my seat in the second row. Before I put my suitcase in the overhead compartment, I pulled the laptop from the outside sleeve. After I sat, I turned it on to check work emails.
A flash of long brown hair caught my gaze, but when I looked up, the woman had already made it past the first-class section. The mousy color resembled the woman from last night, and the thought of her made me wonder if she made her flight, too. Shrugging it off, I tapped the plastic near the keyboard, staring at James’s red hair matted against his cheeks on the screen background. I looked through emails from site managers and foremen reminding me of purchase orders that weren’t being called in, a delivery delay notice regarding sod, more spam advertising ED pills, and another complaint from Mrs. Forsyth.
What was the point of hiring people if they weren’t going to do their jobs? I responded to as many emails as possible before the flight attendants started talking and pulled out my phone. But when I turned on the screen, I realized two things: the lock screen didn’t have a photo of my son; it didn’t have a photo at all. Just a blue, blank lock screen. And when I swiped it, the keypad didn’t come up for my pin. In place of the background of me and my boy at the water park last week, I saw the same shade of blue as the lock screen.
“Motherf—” I started before catching myself. Cursing was another thing Darlene would give me crap for. Even if realizing I grabbed the wrong phone after a one-night stand warranted every curse word in the dictionary.
I sent a text to my phone, sure that Christie – that was her name – would have picked it up. It was on the bathroom counter, I remembered. If she didn’t find my phone, I’d have to get a new one, but either way, Darlene was in for a surprise.
She hated it when I showed up without calling ahead.
When the flight attendant reminded me to put my phone in airplane mode, I groaned.
“One moment,” I snapped, then changed my tone. “Yes, ma’am.”
Her clear blue eyes belied the snarl she almost threw at me before I complied. A man in the seat beside me chuckled, and I met his amused gaze. I hadn’t even noticed him when I took my seat, but his shiny bald head and full white beard made me wonder how I’d missed him at all.
“Tough morning?” he asked, nodding as if he could relate. The plane was barreling down the runway, and I waited for the noise of tires against asphalt to soften before I responded.
“Tough life.” I breathed a laugh, shaking my head as the man chuckled under his breath. My ears popped, and I shifted my jaw so they’d clear again. “Took someone else’s phone by accident. Can’t even see my calendar widget. You don’t realize how much you depend on things until you can’t use them.”
“You should call the bitch,” he said. “She’ll answer. Unless she’s sold it already.”
I shot him a glare. I didn’t need to explain myself to this asshole making assumptions. “I’ll take care of it later.” I didn’t need some old lowlife trying to offer me advice.
The man coughed, and a glint caught my eye. His worn gold band had definitely been there for a while. I sighed. I never thought I’d be here, having sex to release stress and living through life after a divorce. Seeing my kid on my wife’s terms. Ex-wife, I reminded myself. I wasn’t even sure where my wedding band was now.
The flight attendant asked for our orders, and I requested water. My head hurt a bit from that beer, and I hadn’t had anything to drink since. The old man ordered a ginger ale.
“That your kid?” the man asked when the woman gave him his drink.
“Yeah,” I said, hoping he’d stop talking if I kept staring at my laptop. Not remembering where my wedding band was had started bothering me. I used to put it in Darlene’s jewelry dish on the dresser if I needed to take it off, but in the past few months, I barely had much of a home at all. I mostly stayed in the office loft, as I had not found an actual house or apartment since Darlene kicked me out. Probably because I wasn’t looking.
The man grunted. “Marty and I had two. They’re all grown now but was a time once I’d be there like you, talking up clients and findin’ myself somethin’ sweet between meetings.”
I looked at him from the side of my eye. It had to be in storage. I hadn’t taken much with me when I left, but what I did take, I threw in storage. I bought the unit just a few days after signing the papers. But my ring? Did I even take it off then?
“Yeah, can’t quite call them the good ol’ days, now can ya? Not when you’re screwin’ up your life for yourself. Throwin’ out your future.”
“Excuse me?” I turned toward him then.
“I’m just ramblin’. Not much else to do when you’re old and alone with a dyin’ business and a dyin’ heart.” He chuckled, shaking his head. He scratched his chin, though I couldn’t imagine he accomplished anything with that much beard in the way. “Don’t mind me.” He sighed.
“You’re not married?”
When he shrugged, I frowned.
“Marriage don’t need to end for the love to die. No, I reckon she’s somewhere out there lovin’ on our boys still wishin’ they weren’t mine.” He laughed, and while it was a sad sound, it drew a small smile from me and one from him. “I’m not much of a man, son. Not much of anythin’ anymore. I don’t mean nothin’ by what I say, but I noticed that toy, and that’s a nice picture there on your computer. But no ring.” He shook his head. “I’m not a wise man. If you ask me, I’m pretty stupid—all the stuff I thought was important just bein’ paychecks. But if I could just share one thing with a man in my shoes, I’d say I wish someone’d done the same for me.” He chuckled. “Not that I’d’ve done anything different.”
I’d closed my laptop when he mentioned the photo there, but now I was wondering what he had to say. I almost stopped him because I was afraid what he’d say would hit too close to home.
“Don’t take a day for granted. Not a day, not a moment.” The man shook his head. “Now I know that’s what an old guy like me always has to say but listen, we’ve been there, and we mean it when we say don’t take time for granted when you don’t know how much you got left.” His gaze narrowed. “I shit on all my moments—my wife, my kids—and I gave it all to my work. Never met a man who found themselves in a good place when they reached the end of things with all the money. Money don’t leave with you. But when you reach those gates—if you reach ’em—you want the Lord to be there. But hell if you don’t want some others there waitin’ for you, too.”
He looked at his hands, clasped together, his thumbs settled over each other as he pressed his nails into his skin. “Work for your family. But put your family first. It’s the only thing that matters. Otherwise, what do you get out of it?” He sat back, brushing his hands against his pant legs before taking his cup out of the cupholder and sipping it. “I retired with more to give my family than I could ever have wanted. It was all I wanted—to give them everything. But now I don’t have one to give it to.”
I nodded, but what he was saying didn’t really apply to me. I didn’t love my work enough to leave my family behind. All I wanted was to grow the business the way Darlene always wanted—if not for her, then to spite her and for my son. Darlene may tell me to go to hell, but I didn’t need her permission to ensure my son knew how much I loved him.
