AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I hadn’t been able to sleep very well. Tossing and turning, crying intermittently–I felt physically ill from heartbreak.
When I rounded the corner at the bottom of the stairs and walked into the kitchen, I found my dad standing there in the dim glow of a nightlight, drinking a bottle of sparkling water.
It seems he copes with heartbreak the same way.
“Hi, sweetie,” he said softly, his deep-set eyes weary and puffy. “Hope I didn’t wake you.”
“No, you didn’t.” I forced a weak smile. “I couldn’t sleep.”
“Do you want some tea? I can make you tea–”
“Water is what I need.” I pulled a glass from the cabinet and turned on the sink.
“I’m glad you came down, Amelia. I want to talk to you.”
“Dad, I think I’m all talked out–”
“Just hear me out, kiddo. Please?”
I couldn’t say no to him.
I nodded. “OK.”
My dad inhaled deeply, staring at the counter as he let out a slow breath, taking his time. “I always knew your mother was interested in other men. Hell, I knew she was interested in Nathaniel, and had been since she met him, eight years ago. I just never thought she would act on it.”
“You must be so angry with her. I know I am.” I gulped my water, trying to distract myself from the spike of rage in my chest.
My dad shrugged. “Not as angry as you’d think. It’s more of an embarrassment. I feel ashamed.”
“But it’s not your fault,” I protested.
“I know, I know,” he conceded. “But you can’t help what you feel sometimes. Best thing is to let yourself sit with the emotions; it’s the only way you’ll move past them.”
Somehow, my dad could impart wisdom even when he was most vulnerable. “Well, what are you going to do? Will you and Mom get a divorce?”
“I haven’t thought that far ahead yet. But I’m glad I have my baby girl. All of my daughters. You and your sisters are my whole life, Amelia.”
“We love you, Dad. You’ll always have us.”
“I know, sweetie.” His lips formed a wistful smile. “Listen, Amelia, this was all Colleen. I’m positive. Nathaniel wanted no part in it; that much was clear from the way he behaved afterward. I believe your mother threw herself at him, and he couldn’t stop her.”
I examined my fingernails, clicking one under the other. “Larissa and Melinda said the same thing.”
“You should listen to your sisters. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. Amelia, what your mother did shouldn’t ruinyourlife. Or Nathaniel’s. Don’t punish him or yourself for something your mother is to blame for. She needs to be accountable. Let her deal with the consequences of what she did, not you and your budding family.”
“But how can we move on after this? How can I hold a wedding with Nathaniel after my mom threw herself at him? Do I exclude her? How would I explain that my mother wasn’t there to watch her daughter walk down the aisle?”
“I don’t know,” he said, his gaze drifting away, thinking. “Those are all valid questions, and they’re things you’ll have to spend time figuring out. But one thing I do know is Nathaniel. He’s my best friend; I know him to the core. And I saw something in him tonight. I saw his heart.” He put a hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eye. “The man is consumed by his love for you, Amelia. I can tell. I’ve never seen him like this before, but I recognize true love for what it is. Nathaniel is devoted to you. He would never hurt you, I’m certain of that now. You deserve someone like him, who loves you that deeply. I want that for you. It’s what I want for all my girls.”
The truth of his words washed over me like a warm rain. He was right. Nathaniel shouldn’t pay for my mother’s transgressions. Neither should I.
“I’m still anxious,” I admitted, worried about how to work up the strength to deal with my mom, unsure of how to proceed with Nathaniel. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I had screwed everything up, irreparably.
“It’s OK to be anxious.”
I nodded, trying to regulate my breathing. “I just need time, I guess. To live with my feelings, like you said.”
He placed an arm around my shoulder, protective and strong. “Then take that time. You gave me time after I lost it with Nathaniel; give yourself the same grace. Nathaniel will still be there when you’re ready. I know he will.”
