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“Rut?” He laughed bitterly, wondering if he’d once again completely misread the situation. “If all you were offering was a quick, impersonal fumble in the dark, I might take you up on it. But I thought we meant more to each other than that.”
With a shaking hand, she once again reached for her glass of wine, drinking deeply. As he watched her, he wondered why he was finding it so hard to separate what this lovely young woman wanted from him from what Sophia had. Was he so damaged from what had happened to him in his youth that he could never trust a woman not to have an ulterior motive? Maybe Allison was exactly what she seemed—a sweet young lady who wanted to explore her sexuality without asking anything from him in return. But he was already too emotionally invested to risk it.
She sat the glass back down very deliberately, then stood, her eyes awash with tears. “The last thing I would ever want is to hurt you, Quinn. I’ve told you how much I care for you, and I won’t apologize for trying to explore the attraction we feel for each other. But your story did make it clear to me why you don’t feel the same. I hope we can still be friends.”
Turning, she moved blindly toward the door, tripping over the edge of his rug and barely catching herself. With a mute curse, he surged to his feet and went after her, realizing that in trying to protect himself, he’d hurt her. In this case, he was Sophia, and Allison was the one who’d trusted him with her burgeoning sexuality. He should be treating that precious flower like the gift it was, not trampling it beneath his feet.
He couldn’t imagine the courage it had taken her to come to him, to offer herself in such a way, when all of society said that it was wrong. His Allison was one in a million, and he couldn’t bear to let her walk out his door for good.
“Allison, wait.” He reached her just as she got to the door and turned her around, staring down at her tear-streaked face. “Don’t ever think I don’t want you. I’ve been half-mad for you since we first met.”
She blinked up at him, tears still streaming down her cheeks, her eyes filled with confusion. “I don’t know what you’re saying.”
He couldn’t blame her for her confusion. He didn’t know what he meant himself. All he knew was that he needed to forget about his past and take this miracle that had fallen into his lap. Allison wanted him to be her first lover, and as long as he went into this with his eyes wide open and she didn’t want anything else from him, perhaps they could both make it through the experience unscathed.
“I’m saying that I want to make love to you.” Sweeping her up into his arms, he strode toward his bedroom, hoping he wasn’t making the biggest mistake of his life.
