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My heart sinks, and the words spill out of me. “I don’t think I want to hear about it, Henry.”
He’s quiet for a beat. “Why not?”
I shrug and stare out at his yard without seeing.Because I wanted that to be me. Because I don’t want you going out with her. Because I’ve been lying to myself for a good while now about how I feel about you.
There are a dozen reasons I could give him and not a single good reason I should give any of them. This is messy. But I’m too tired not to tell the truth. I sigh, and it’s defeat. “Because it will make me sad.”
“How did you know it went badly?”
I blink at him, and he’s studying me with an intensity that sends a shiver down my spine. A good one. “It went badly?”
“Very badly.”
I consider this. “Maybe I do want to hear about it.”
“Sadist.”
“More like rubbernecker. So tell me.”
He rubs his palms on his jeans. “I couldn’t concentrate, so the conversation prompts you gave me were useless. In fact, I was so distracted that Leigh finally called me on it.”
“That’s too bad.” There is a shameful note of glee in my tone. “Why were you so distracted?”
“Dr. Leigh diagnosed the problem. She’s pretty good at her job.”
“How nice for her.” I can’t stand this woman.
His mouth twitches. “She seems to think that I have a thing for my neighbor.”
But she might be a pretty good psychologist.
“Do you agree with that diagnosis?” I hold my breath, hoping I know the answer. Hoping I suddenly understand why he’s corrupted his yard with inflatables.
He reaches over and picks up one of my hands, twining his fingers with mine, and my heartbeat pulses in my fingertips. “It’s hard to argue with the evidence.”
“Which is what?” I’m fully breathless now.
“That I think about you constantly. That if I’m not with you, I want to be with you. That my day is better if you’re in it. That you give me all the symptoms of a panic attack but they feel good.”
It’s so awkward and so perfectly Henry.
I turn toward him. “I make your heart pound?”
“Yes.”
“Your palms sweat?”
“Can’t you feel them?”
“Your stomach flips?”
“It’s awful.”
“You get short of breath?”
“So far, only when you kiss me.” He stands and pulls me to my feet. “I have one more decoration to show you.”
He doesn’t let go of my hand but tows me gently to his front door and then through it, shutting it behind us and backing me against it.
