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I was more annoyed and angrier with each step away from his house than I should’ve been. It took an hour to walk home, but when locked inside, I called Aubrey.
I wanted to tell her the truth, but hearing her warm greeting made it harder to lie and be honest. So, I listened to her tell me about a how she and Ethan prepared her classroom earlier in the day. They were so cute, I could puke glitter. Ethan and Aubrey were meant to be, while I was stuck in a fake relationship, when I knew better. Because fake or real, I had feelings… And they were starting to really nag.
FOURTEEN
September
Aubrey and Ethan invited me over to watch my fake boyfriend play baseball later in the week. I went for my best friend and the free pizza and wine, spending the game curled on their couch trying to pretend it didn’t frustrate me each time Rowan moved.
Did it overwhelm me how I hadn’t heard from him at all since the night I walked home from his place? Unfortunately. Did I try to tell him that? Of course not.
“Is everything okay between you two?” Aubrey asked during a commercial break. “Because he asked me to feed his cat. Do you think it was out of habit? I mean,” she nervously glanced between Ethan and I, “are you two okay?”
“More wine, please.” I mumbled, closing my eyes. I heard Aubrey get up and wander to the kitchen, muttering something in the distance.
Ethan poked me with his toe. “You haven’t been watching.”
“Nope.”
“Good.” He turned the volume back on once the commercials ended. “Ouch,” he hissed. “He is not himself out there.”
Sitting up, I looked from Ethan’s worried eyes to the game. Rowan struck out at bat. That never happened to him. Ever.
“What’s going on with him?” Ethan wondered aloud. “The last time he was ever this off was... Hey, Aubs?”
“Yeah?” She came back into the living room carrying a bottle of wine and a pint of ice cream with a spoon. “Here,” she shrugged, offering the ice cream to me, “looks like you might need this. What, Ethan?”
“I was just thinking about college and that one game Row had when he let the other team get a run when he was at second base. What happened that he was so off then?”
Aubrey groaned, sitting next to me and muting the commercials. “I think he broke up with that redhead he was dating. Oh,” she turned to me, “did you guys…”
“Did we what? Break up?” I answered, looking between their worried eyes, laughing a little at how ridiculous I sounded to myself. We weren’t really dating. We couldn’t break up. “No. I don’t know why he sucks today. Maybe,” I dug my spoon into the cookies and cream, “he just sucks, period.”
“Well,” Ethan snickered, “at least one of you is your normal self today.”
With the game resuming, I devoured the ice cream and pretended I didn’t enjoy watching Rowan mess up. Not in a vindictive, horrible person sort of way, but I was just thinking that he was a jerk.
“You two are so freaking cute,” Aubrey cooed, pointing to the screen. As the seventh inning stretch began, the screen turned to an announcement for the sweetest day contest. Fans could vote on who they thought were the sweetest so far, and our faces were front and center as the votes tallied in our favor.
“I’ll feed the cat,” I told Aubrey, staring at the screen when the game resumed.
“There we go!” Ethan bounced from the couch, jumping up and down when Rowan was back in the game, hitting a home run over the outfield and getting two more runs in for the team.
“I guess he just needed to see his girlfriend,” Aubrey squealed, spilling my pint of ice cream as she hugged me tightly.
“Finally,” Ethan shouted at the screen. “He turned it around! Let’s see them get through the batting lineup and he’ll do it again.”
At Rowan’s second time to bat in the inning, the camera closed in on him. He paced the plate, swinging the bat around his shoulders to warm up, shifting his weight as he settled into position. Watching him before the pitch, I noticed things about him I hadn’t before. The details. The way his jaw clenched beneath his helmet, as though he was fighting through something. His blue eyes were potent, stiffly focused on the pitcher. But as focused as he appeared, I worried there was something missing underneath the beautiful, dirty exterior.
After his reaction on Saturday, I knew it wasn’t my place to probe. Once the game ended, I was thankful Ethan and Aubrey only asked two more questions about us because I was starting to not have answers myself.
Crashing at Ethan and Aubrey’s house after the game meant I could scour her fancy wardrobe for work the following morning. Aubrey was going into her school early to meet with some teachers, which left me in free reign of her clothes.
“I’m heading out,” Ethan called from the front door. “Brunch on Sunday?”
“Sure!”
“Love you, Mer.”
