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“Bill…what happened—you said something before about accidentally taking a life.”
He stopped, his hand on the doorknob. “Did me a fifteen-year stint for it, too.”
“You killed someone.”
“Doesn’t matter if you didn’t mean to or not, you take a life, you got to pay for it.”
My gut hollowed out. I’d not paid for it, other than nightmares and guilt, because Marshal stepped in and cleaned up my mess.Shit.
“Seems to me you might know a little what I’m talking about already.” Bill drilled me with a stare. “Don’t you?”
“Does it ever…get easier?”
“Some, but not much, and that’s okay. The minute you forget what you did, it’ll be too easy to slip back into that way of life. You hear me, boy? You don’t ever forget what’s happened. You forgive yourself, but never forget. That way you’ll never make the mistake again.”
I wasn’t so sure I’d ever forgive myself, either. Mom and now Jenna had both harped on me to forgive myself, but I couldn’t. I didn’t deserve that kind of mercy. No, it was better that I stay focused and keep making up for my past.
“Any plans with your little one for Valentine’s Day?”
“Little one?You know, you’re notthatold, Bill.”
He laughed, his big belly shaking. “Maybe not chronologically, but that’s not all that ages a man. I’d never peg you for a twenty-four-year-old.”
That wasn’t the first time I’d heard that. “Well, when shit happens, you can either grow up or…well, you just grow up fast.”
Bill eyeballed me a long time, opening his mouth as if to speak a couple times then finally grinned and said, “I know you got someone. You never brought her around here yet. Scared old Bill might run her off?”
“Funny.” I offered my hand for him to shake. “Thanks, Bill. For everything.”
He grinned as he took it. “Anything you need, boy, you come to me. I got your back. No matter what, you hear me?”
I nodded taking note of the intensity of how he said it. Almost as if he knew more about me than he should. There was no way he could, but still, I couldn’t shake the feeling he did somehow.
“Now, let’s go get a drink before you run out and sweep your Valentine off her feet.”
I pulled open the door and waved Bill through, totally seeing him in a different light. The old guy never ceased to surprise me, that’s for sure. I bet he would have made a great dad to some kid.
He’d killed someone, accidentally, and paid his price. He was a better man for it, stronger, and was helping other idiots like me and Drey. Maybe there was hope for me yet. I’d never done time for what I’d done to Issie, but my brain sure had locked me up as punishment.
And now, for some reason, Fate had given Lina to me. I didn’t deserve her or her love, but I had it.
I pulled Bill’s door shut and confirmed it was locked, then turned around and rammed shoulders with Sarah.
She spun around, her drink spilling onto the floor, and flopped into my arms.
“Hey, you.” She looked at me with glazed over eyes. Her breath reeked of alcohol.
I glanced down the hall where she’d come from. “You okay?”
“Hmmm.” She leaned into me more as I worked to step away from her. So trashed, she swayed like a leaf in a windstorm. “Why don’t you like me?”
“Sarah.” I took another step toward the open space, totally uncomfortable being alone back here with her.
She waivered as she misstepped toward me and reached for my arm.
“Easy there.” I held her forearm and glanced toward the end of the hallway. “Hey, Drey!” Hopefully he could hear me, but the music was at a high point, vibrating the walls around me, no way would he hear me back here.
“Wanna be…”hiccup. “My Valentine?”
