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He whipped around to face her, brows knit low. “For what? I’ve done nothing that requires your thanks.”
She took a deep breath and steeled her courage. She had to be stronger than she’d been until now, not weak and unforgiving, so she had to repent of her willfulness. Perhaps her anger was justified, but he was not going to make anything of himself if she went right on beating him. If she loved him as she’d said all this time she did, then she had to act as such. Sometimes love was difficult, and this was one of those times.
“Thank you for caring for Colby. Thank you for bringing him out here and making sure he had food. Thank you for doing so even after I left.” She threaded her fingers behind her, hoping the slight change showed her acceptance of the situation he’d created. The fight had gone out of her.
The topmost part of his cheeks—all she could see of him—raised, then lowered, as if he was taking either a deep breath or swallowing so hard that it pained him. The creases by his eyes relaxed as the tension in his brow eased. “I guess the appropriate answer is, you’re welcome.”
She wanted to believe that but knew better. She wasn’t welcome yet, but soon. “Are you returning tomorrow to check on him? I’m sure I can take direction from Gideon, but he doesn’t have the time to mother Colby. He doesn’t even do so with our sheep. But I would like to have professional assurance that what I’m doing is helping.” She was painfully aware that her words contradicted what she’d said to him in the wagon. Anger had coursed through her like a flood then. Now, she only wanted to make sure she saw him as often as possible. With her promise to her father, this was the only way.
“That was my plan, yes.” He lingered by his horse, his gaze waffling between her and his mount, as if he was unsure if he should ride away or stay and talk. She saw his hesitation in the flex of his gloved fingers and the harsh angle of his tense shoulders.
“I don’t mean to keep you. I’m sorry.” She stepped back. If she let him go now, he’d be more willing to come tomorrow. She’d lose this battle, but she’d be closer to winning the war.
“You confuse me, Alice.”
His use of her given name still pained her, and she prayed she hid the flinch that she felt right down to her toes. She wanted to hear him caress her name, as he had years before. When their love was new and fresh and nothing could keep them apart. Except him, apparently.
He didn’t wait for her to explain and instead thrust his boot back into the stirrup, gripped the saddle and mounted quickly as if he was worried she’d stop him again. He touched his hat as he turned his horse and headed down the drive.
His broad shoulders naturally moved with the motion as he rode, taking the horse’s stride and working with it, not against. She couldn’t help but follow his progression down the lane until the slight roll of the hills swallowed him up. A sigh escaped her lips, and she forced a smile.
Maybe there was still hope, maybe not. But no matter the outcome, she could say she’d done everything in her power to change his heart. She might not be the woman she was, but just maybe, she was the woman he was really meant to love all along.
Gideon strode from the barn and handed her an empty bottle. “I thought you’d gone to visit Hannah?”
“I did and came back with her puppy.” She glanced down at the bottle. “How often am I supposed to feed it?” She should’ve been out there to hear the directions from Kent.
“Four times a day. Once right away in the morning, once right before bed, and twice in between. Can you handle that?”
“As long as you handle all my other chores,” she joked. Once taken on, they rarely gave chores back to whomever had them previously.
“I always assumed I’d get them back when Kent returned.” He smiled as he walked away, then glanced over his shoulder to shock her even further. “Seems kind of fitting, don’t you think?”
Chapter6
Darkness seeped into every corner of the barn like a cloak pooled on the floor, only banished by the small hanging lantern near the cow’s stanchion. The cow had long been turned out for the night, leaving Alice alone with little Colby. Even Lilly had abandoned her spot for another place.
He didn’t seem quite as weak as he had that morning, but she was doing nothing different from what Hannah had been doing. Colby whined as the bottle emptied and he laid his chin on her ankle. She scratched behind his ears, relishing his soft fur. Puppies were common on the ranch, but every one of them became workers to replace those who were too old or, for whatever reason, couldn’t continue the job. They’d never had a pet dog.
Pa had told her that, even when the dogs were kind and allowed her to cuddle them, they were not pets and would never become them. They bred the dogs to do a job, and that job took every ounce out of them. So much so that they wouldn’t forget what God had made them to do. They wouldn’t make good pets because that’s not what they were made for.
She wasn’t so sure she agreed and after reminiscing about her childhood, snuggling in the barn with various sheepdogs over the years, she longed for a home of her own where she could have a dog that didn’t have any other job but to see to her. The dog could keep her safe and her feet warm at night.
A more persistent desire entered her heart, battling the idea of a dog. That desire made itself plainly known when a shadowy figure appeared in the door. One she knew in an instant was Kent. The man who could certainly keep her feet warmer than any dog. She swallowed hard. “I . . . wasn’t expecting you.”
In the dark, he hadn’t pulled up his bandana, and she wasn’t about to let him know that the dark didn’t cover him as well as he apparently assumed. She drank in the sight of him, tall, handsome, and shadowy in the faint glow of the lantern.
“I wanted to check on the dog. I thought it was late enough that you’d be finished by now.” He stalled a few feet away from where she sat in the hay.
“There’s no point in waiting until I’m gone. You’ve come all this way. You might as well look at him.” She flicked hay off her skirts, hoping she didn’t look too frightfully awful after a day of work. The baseboards had required her attention as soon as she’d finished in the barn earlier, since Mrs. Eliza saw them and pointed out that Ma wouldn’t know it was Alice who’d left a job half-done.
She’d dutifully finished taking one break to come back out and feed Colby. But now, she only wanted a minute with Kent. One she hadn’t dreamed she’d get. Perhaps her method would work even quicker than she’d hoped.
“Did you have a pleasant day?”
He strode forward and crouched by Colby, ignoring her question as he felt under the dog’s arms. Then, he took out his listening scope and ignored her some more while he listened to the little dog breathe.
“Any change in his behavior or level of activity today?” His eyes met hers, but they were emotionless and gruff, not warm as she’d hoped.
