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32
CARA
Choose? They expect him to choose?
And yet as the true ridiculousness of the threat sinks in, Killian’s answer bleeds into his eyes when our gazes meet. There hasn’t been a moment gone by where I haven’t been absolutely secure in the knowledge that he would come for me, that he would fix this.
In his absence, with the house dark, Archer unconscious, and nothing but Blair’ssnivelingfor company, I knew he’d come. I knew he would never leave me to suffer such a situation. Of course, I’d hoped he would return with men, even his brother but he pulled up alone.
The pain in his eyes that melted into anger when he awoke from the blow to face this fucked up situation did nothing to dampen mycertaintythat he would get us out of this. One way or another he would find a solution where we could all walk away alive.
But as the seconds tick by and Killian’s eyes linger on mine, the answer he wants to vocalize so clearly in his eyes, I realize one of us will have to die. And the choice he wants to make, he will not vocalize.
Why?? Just pick and let this be done with!
Despite the terribly frantic patter of my heart and constant heat flushing over my skin, numbness has settled deep into my muscles from being seated for so long. Each subtle shift of my limbs only serves to draw pain from the wiry rope used to bind me to the chair but it doesn’t deter me. I’ve been working frantically to free myself from these bindings since the moment Killian woke up and pulled the focus of every guard here. If they’re not focused on me, I’m not going to sit here and let this play out without some kind of fight from me.
I’ve been tied up and left for far too long.
My left-hand curls into a cone shape, hidden by the palm of my right, and each time someone speaks, I subtly twist my wrist left, then right and back again in order to rip myself free.
In movies they make this look so easy, just pop out a thumb and you’re home free.
The thought spikes suddenly in my mind, an odd occurrence of humor to try and block out the fear running rampant like fire ants over my skin.
Such an act of defiance was impossible a few hours ago but Killian's presence fuels my confidence. It’s easy to ignore the burning rawness of my wrist when my every instinct is fixated on Killian, fearing that he will say or do something that will put him on the end of a bullet.
The same way Archer tried to fight for me.
“I’m going to kill you,” Killian growls suddenly, his voice so deep that it seems to rumble around the room. It cuts through the silence and draws a twisted look of contempt from Nikolay. My heart skips a painful beat and I half expect Nikolay to open fire just for the back talk.
He doesn’t appear to appreciate being made to linger for too long and I can’t decide if Killian is playing for time, or hoping he can taunt Nikolay into a mistake that will win him the favor.
Why won’t he just choose? Would it really be so bad to play into this psychopath?
“For men stuck in the past, there’s no honor here,” Killian continues and he glances around the room, making lingering eye contact with every single guard. “I’m going to kill every single one of you for daring to come into my home. For laying your filthy fucking Russian hands on my wife, and injuring my friend. It’s going to be slow but I’m going tofuckingenjoy it. And you?” He fixates on the guard behind me. “I’ll peel the flesh from your fucking bones for hurting her.”
His words are like fire, his eyes darker than they’ve ever been before and the threat hangs deadly in the air. It has an effect though as the floorboards creak behind me and the guard there shifts his weight.
Killian is spitting threats rather than making a choice because he can’t make that choice. Killing women is dishonorable.
But where is their honor? Do they really give a fuck right now?
Oh.
It strikes me then like a lance to the heart, pulling my entire torso forward slightly. He doesn’t think Nikolay will honor his choice, regardless of what he says. And why would he? What does it matter to the Russians if they’re killing a man or a woman? I’ve seen the state of their disgusting brothels.
Killian picks me to live and Nikolay still kills me afterwards so he can suffer, right? And if he picks Blair, could I live with knowing she died so I could live?
Yes, if it’s her I could.
No… no I couldn’t.
I may detest her with every screaming fiber of my body but her life shouldn’t be in my hands. I can’t make that choice, not now.
This is less of a choice and more of a mind game. Perhaps Nikolay expects Killian to get on his knees and beg. He won’t.
But for me and our unborn child, he might.
