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“Everyone here thinks you choose not to get out much. They don’t know the truth.”
What was she supposed to say to that? Explain that she’d beenregressingsince she’d been rescued from captivity eighteen months ago? That she was getting worse, not better?
She crossed her arms over her chest. “Believe it or not, I don’t discuss my personal life with most people. I have a lot of friends in Oak Creek, but I don’t want to burden them.”
“If they’re your friends, then the truth wouldn’t be a burden. They’ll want to help you.”
She took the last sip of her coffee then slid the cup toward the end of the table. “Well, there’s not much they can do, so there’s no point in my making a whole production out of it. And I’d appreciate it if you’d do the same. Everyone knows I don’t like to go out. That’s close enough to the truth.”
One of his eyebrows rose again. “Except for times like right now where you’re basically trapped in a building. If your friends knew what was going on, they could help you.”
“You think you know me so well,Outlaw?” She used his Zodiac code name like it was some creative insult, when all it was was an accurate description of his sexy personality. “Just because you happened to witness that asshole Theodore Wilson get the drop on me? You don’t know shit.”
She was overreacting. They both knew it, but he remained calm, which just pissed her off more.
“He used your weaknesses against you. That can happen to anybody.”
They stared at each other, that day a few months ago resting between them. Mark didn’t say anything.
Was he remembering her curled up on the floor, begging Wilson not to take her outside like he threatened to?
Was he remembering having to carry her to her bed once Wilson left and give her a sedative because she couldn’t get herself under control?
Was he remembering how weak and pathetic she’d been?
Thank God he didn’t know that she’d gotten even worse since then.
Mark reached for her hands on the table, but she slid them back. “I’m not trying to act like I know you. Although I would like to get to know you better if you’d let me. You know that.”
She did know that. He’d made multiple attempts to talk to her in the past few months. It was one of the reasons she’d run and hidden in Oak Creek.
She stood up. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’ve got a lot of work to do, and I’m not looking for any new friends.”
She winced. She was being such a bitch. But he already knew too much truth about her. Truth she was desperate to keep everyone else from knowing.
And even with all the truth he did know, he didn’t know everything. Didn’t know the most important parts.
And he never would. No one would.
“See you around, Outlaw.”
He didn’t say a word as she walked away. But as she got to the door, her steps slowed like she was sludging through mire. Every step got heavier and harder to take.
Through the glass, she could see her car parked in the lot fifty feet away. It might as well have been fifty miles. She couldn’t make it. She froze a few feet from the door.
No.
No, she could not panic now. She had to walk outside to her car. She refused to make a fool out of herself here. In front of Mark, in front of Lexi. Word would get around to everyone.
But she couldn’t force herself to move. She demanded her arm reach for the door handle, but it stayed pinned to her side. She couldn’t move forward, couldn’t even move backward.
She could feel sweat already pooling on her forehead. The sounds from the bar became muffled around her. It was like she was outside her own body.
There was no brute-forcing her way through these panic attacks. Multiple therapists had warned her of that. People who didn’t experience them often thought someone couldmind-over-matterthem. Think happy thoughts and the panic would recede.
That wasn’t true. All she could do was survive.
She felt someone behind her, and a deep voice whispered in her ear. “I’m going to pull your car up to the door.”
