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“Then you’ll have to find a practice once this is all over,” I tell her.
But as the words come out, I realise it’s not the happiest of thoughts. I know she has to go sometime. Once her folks are in prison or dead, I don’t mind either, she’s going to go on with her life. It’s the reason I’ve fought this attraction. This requirement to protect her won’t be there forever.
She has a life outside the motorcycle club. I’m pretty sure she has friends and colleagues who want to see her again. And I can’t hold her back from that. No matter how much I want her to stay. Havin’ her close is somethin’ special, but one day, like everyone in my life, she’ll leave.
And I’m going to have to say goodbye again.
“I might,” she answers me suddenly, dragging me away from my dark thoughts. “But I can’t tell the future, so who knows what’s going to happen? There are so many factors that could change the path of anyone’s life.”
“You have to go,” I tell her. “There’s no life here for you. Not for the kind of work you’re goin’ ta do. Helpin’ people is important.”
“You want me to go?” Her eyes penetrate right through me.
I don’t respond, because I’m not sure how to. If I said no, she’d think there’s more here, but also, I don’t know if I can get attached to someone who can up and leave at any time.
A moment passes, and Miren pushes to her feet. It’s dark, and I can’t see if she’s angry.
“Where are you goin’?”
“To sleep.” Her voice is tight with emotion, and I watch her leave.
I should go after her, but I don’t because I have no claim on her. Aye, we coulda fucked tonight, but it didn’t happen. Probably for the best.
A flick of a lighter catches my attention. Sully saunters over to where I am and leans against the wall. “Big mistake, brother,” he tells me. “Big fuckin’ mistake.” I don’t argue with him, because for the first time in my life, I can’t deny it.
SEVENTEEN
MIREN
The long,heavy wooden dinner table is filled with the brothers, the Bastards, and a few of the girls who work in the club. Callia is seated beside me, and I know she’s going to ask about Monster’s fascination with me. He’s been following me around since he found out the truth. Watching me when I’m at work, walking me back to my room. He hasn’t once touched me or tried to kiss me again, but his attention is focused. So much so that the guys have been whispering about him finally claiming someone.
I’m not sure how I feel about it. My focus is still on finding my mother and Patrick. He will always be a monster in my eyes, more so than the man who took me in when I needed protection. The sadness that does come over me when I think about what my mum did still eats away at me. The guilt of her actions has chosen to take its ire out on me.
As much as I want to be normal, to forget about the past, I can’t. I glance around the table, and when my gaze locks on Monster, he’s staring. Much like he’s done since the first day I saw him. He doesn’t smile or offer a hint as to what he’s thinking.
“Are you two finally getting some?” Callia whispers in my ear, causing my cheeks to heat, and I force myself to look away from him.
“No,” I tell her. “What are you even talking about?”
“Oh please,” she hisses. “I can see the sexual tension between the two of ye. It’s so obvious. I’m pretty sure if you were to tell him you want to go upstairs right now, the man would drag you up there. Or he’d most probably bend you over this table and show everyone you’re his.”
“Calli!” I gasp out loud, causing a few of the guys to turn to us. Rebel looks over, his gaze narrowing on us.
“Aye, he’s an eejit if he doesn’t do something soon.” She winks at me, accompanied by a soft giggle.
As much as she’s embarrassing me right now, I can’t help but smile. It feels good to be welcomed. Even after the lads found out who I really am. I was convinced I would be sent packing, or buried six feet under, but they’ve given me the benefit of the doubt. There’s no way I intend on breaking my promise to stand by them when it comes down to it. It was an easy decision.
The music is turned up, and the rest of the family seated around the table shout and cheer. The beer is flowing freely, and so is the whisky. Callia pulls me from the chair, and we hold hands as we move to the middle of the room. It’s enormous, with a pool table off to one side and a jukebox on the other. A curved bar sits in the corner, opposite the entrance. A couple of the prospects are serving drinks, while a handful of the guys are playing darts. The dim lighting offers enough illumination to make it feel homely, almost magical.
With the heavy rain outside, it’s warm indoors. The song changes, and ‘Do You Remember’ by Jarryd James fills the room. Callia and I start dancing with each other—slowly, sensually. I wonder if she’s trying to get Rebel jealous, or perhaps tease him. I’m not sure, but I can feel a pair of eyes burning into my back. When I spin around, I find Monster watching me.
Callia’s hands grip my hips, and we both twist as we lower into a crouch before rising again. I wouldn’t work in the club, but I feel comfortable here with the brand-new family I’ve found.
I turn to face her again as the next song comes on. ‘Drive You Insane’ by Daniel Di Angelo. We’re dancing together, giggling like schoolgirls when suddenly I’m ripped from Callia’s arms and dragged out of the room by the big, strong hands of the President of the Royal Bastards MC. When we reach the long, empty hallway, he spins on his heel, ensuring my back is right up against the smooth, cold wall.
“Are ye tryin’ ta feck with my head?” His question is sneered, but the look in his eyes is pure lust. Dark, seductive, and alluring. The man is the epitome of a monster right now. Ready to devour its prey. And I’m caught in the line of fire.
“What do you mean?”
