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My descent into madness is slow. I dig my heels into his back, chasing the rapture tickling my tailbone. He circles my clit, and my head falls back. I’m walking a tightrope; one tiny push can send me spiraling.
And then he gives it to me.
Falling through the darkness, I’m met with a series of explosions detonating within when I reach the bottom. Like firecrackers, he lit the fuse and watched them pop. Flashes burst behind my closed lids, pleasure rupturing the seam that holds me together.
When the mattress dips around me again, I’m still dizzy from the aftershocks. The tangy taste of my own sweetness clings tohis lips as they fuse with mine again. I barely register the rustle of clothing or the telltale tear of the foil wrapper before he lowers himself on top of me.
He stalls, dropping his forehead to mine. “I don’t wanna hurt you.”
His admission holds a meaning deeper than face value. Jace has hurt me more times than I can count. He kicked me when I was down, but he also protected me, kept me safe from harm, and believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself. Under the layers of forced arrogance and swagger is a flawed human being, just like the rest of us. A human being deserving of love and forgiveness.
“So don’t,” I whisper, looking up into the face of the man breaking before me.
“I don’t know how not to.”
“I know.”
He nudges my opening, but my tightness deflects his attempted entry. He lets out an irritated curse, his teeth taking my earlobe as he tries again. A sharp breath hits my lungs. I squeeze my lids as he slowly fits inside me.
“Breathe,” he instructs, and I do. “Good girl. Now, look at me.”
We lock eyes as his hips begin to move at a steady pace. His brow set in grim determination, he’s holding back. I can tell by the set of his jaw and the hairpin line of his lips. His pace unhurried, he slides in and out until my whimpers of pain become moans of pleasure. My lashes flutter, but I hold his stare the way he told me to.
Forcing my breath out in shallow pants, he pumps harder. I tighten in response, and he eases back. “Goddamn,” he slurs. “I somehow knew this pussy was gonna be the death o’ me.”
He sits up on his haunches. His hands skim under my shirt, and I shift to help him get it off. It falls to the side, forgotten as he palms my breast. The next thing I know, his arm sweepsunder my back and pulls me off the bed. He dips his head, lapping at my nipple until it forms a stiff peak on his tongue, then he attacks the other. The insurmountable ache I feel inside threatens to tear me in two. I’m a rag doll in his arms. A plaything going limp as he drives into me again and again. Powerless. Helpless. Just the way he likes me.
Falling back on my hands, I cross my ankles at the small of his back. He holds my hips and feeds himself into me until I’m completely full. From this position, every thrust sends a miniature shock wave rippling up my spine. I feel him deep, his balls slapping my ass as he tips his head back in carnal ecstasy.
He sweeps his fingertips over my lips. “Suck.” I pull them into my mouth, my cheeks going hollow as he slides them back out. “Next time, that’ll be my dick.” With sodden fingers, he rubs my clit until I’m nothing but a wasted pile of sobs.
A mighty roar echoes through the space as he comes alongside me. He rests his full weight on my chest, his garbled pants beating against my ear. When it’s over, he rolls to the side, taking his heat with him. I lie on my back as he kicks his leg over the edge of the bed. Muscles pull taut under his skin. He leans on his elbows, his head in his hands.
“You alright?” I ask.
“Yup.” He snaps the condom off and chucks it in the trash can before returning beside me.
I curl into his side. Resting my head on his shoulder, I trace the hard lines of his body, over the hills and valleys of his abdominal muscles and down the tight V at his hips, but he remains turned away. Another chill in the atmosphere, a shift in the matrix.
“I guess this means I should break up with Troy.”
“Why?”
A lump forms in my throat. “Why do you think?”
He lifts my hand off his body and sets it on the mattress between us. “We fucked, princess. We ain’t goin’ steady.”
I push up to my elbow, my pulse beginning to race. “I thought …”
When he turns to face me, his expression is as hard as stone. “You thought what? That I wanted to be your boyfriend? You wanted to go slummin’ with the poor folk, and I was more than happy to oblige, but let’s not make this out to be somethin’ it ain’t.”
Emotion claws up my face, making my skin crawl. “You asshole.” I snatch my shirt out from under me and throw it over my head. “You cold, calculating piece of shit.”
He snickers. “What was it that Golightly bitch said? Never love a wild thing, baby.”
You mustn’t give your heart to a wild thing. The more you do, the stronger they get.
I jump to my feet and throw on my shorts. “I can’t even look at you right now.”
