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That he would even ask me—breathless, muffled against my neck—brings tears to my eyes. But these aren’t tears of pain or sadness. More like gratitude. I smile through them even though he can’t see them. “I’m fine. Better than fine.”
CHAPTER39
I’m sure the last thing Piper expected when she got back from her lecture was to find Colt in the middle of putting a shirt on. “What are you doing?” she shrieks. “Get out of here! Oh my god!”
Colt and I look up in unison. I lost track of time, and we scrambled out of bed to try and get him out of here before Piper returned from class. We didn’t make it.
And now she’s standing in the doorway to our room, looking horrified. “I’m getting security.”
“No, wait. It’s not like that.”
“What, did he tell you to say that?” I don’t think she could give him a filthier look than she is right now. “I ought to cut your balls off for what you’ve done. How could you? What was it this time? How did you convince her?”
Colt doesn’t say a word. I don’t know if he’s shocked or amused by her reaction. I reach her, take her by the arm, and pull her into the room, then close the door so we have at least a modicum of privacy. “It isn’t like that this time. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s complicated. I promise, though. He didn’t force me into it.”
Then I shoot him a look over my shoulder. “This time.”
Understanding dawns in his eyes, and he waves a hand between us. “You told her?”
“I told her everything, yeah. I had to talk to somebody. I was going crazy.”
“Don’t even pretend it’s not true.” The look Piper’s giving him could melt steel. If I didn’t truly believe she meant it when she said she wanted us to be friends again, I would believe it now. She’s ready to kill for me.
He lets out a long breath before finally shrugging. “I’m not going to pretend. It’s all true—I’m sure she didn’t exaggerate anything. I’m not proud of it, believe me.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better.” Piper turns to me, her eyes going wide. “I don’t get it. Why would you?”
Even if Colt wasn’t here, I wouldn’t know what to say. “It’s complicated. I don’t understand it myself.”
“It is complicated,” Colt adds.
“I don’t even want to look at you.” She throws her backpack on her bed and plops down, arms folded. “Even if your dad made you do it, you could have told Leni why.”
When I turn to Colt, lifting an eyebrow, I find him staring at the floor with his thumbs hooked through the belt loops on his jeans.
“She does have a point,” I tell him. Amazing how her being here makes it easier for me to say all the things that have been on my mind. He has a way of mixing me up, but Piper’s presence gives me back a little bit of myself.
“It’s not that easy, and it wasn’t like I knew everything ahead of time. We knew my dad was obsessed with you and that he wanted us to befriend you. We figured if we did the opposite, you wouldn’t want to be around us… including my dad.”
“Oh…” That does make sense, but it doesn’t explain many other things. “That was before. What about the past few weeks?”
“Again, we didn’t think he would ever take it this far. He did this whole thing in stages, always telling us to do one more thing and then he would be done. Well, that one more thing always turned into more, and by that time, we were already so entangled he would have blamed all of it on us anyway.”
“I know he’s your dad, and I know you feel like you have to be loyal to your father or whatever, but I can’t let him get away with what he did. And if you care about me the way you say you do, you’ll have to prove it by helping me make him pay for what he did.”
He’s slow to sit on my bed, and suddenly, he looks drained. “I can’t do that.”
“Why the hell not?” I blurt out. All the pain, frustration, loneliness, and confusion are in that question, ringing out in the room.
“Because I just can’t.” His voice is so small, almost reminding me of a little boy’s. “And I can’t tell you more than that. I wish I could. I wish I could help you. I want him to pay, too. For all of it, for everything. But it’s just not possible. You aren’t the only person involved here.”
I’m not the only person involved.
I don’t know why it took me so long to figure it out.
The way they reacted when I mentioned her. The torn-up picture and the way they stared at it. All the secrecy.
“Is this about your mother?” I whisper, knowing it’s true but also sort of hoping it isn’t. “She’s supposed to be dead, but you told me she’s not. Is he… using her against you somehow?”
