He smiled and did as I asked. The rest of the time was filled with me watching him do a written test, work the controls of the crane, and finally I had to evaluate his performance. He passed the test with flying colors. A part of me wanted him to fail just so I could talk to him again. Knowing that he was coming to the club just to see me turned me on even more.
As I finished his evaluation and printed out his temporary certification card, he said, “I uh… I won’t be back here for five years. You think I could have your phone number? I would love to talk to you again.”
His eyes were hopeful, but he remained calm and seemed unfazed like my presence wasn’t doing anything near what his presence was doing to me. Maybe he was masking it like I was. I could feel my cheeks heating up uncontrollably. This wasn’t a good idea. He would surely figure out who I was. “I’m sorry, Mr. Dent, but I can’t do that.”
“You have a man? I apologize for not asking.”
Just by his statement, I could tell he wasn’t used to rejection. In his mind, I’d only rejected him because I was involved with someone. “No, I don’t. I’m single.” I slid his certification receipt to him. “Enjoy the rest of your day, Mr. Dent.”
He bit his bottom lip again as his eyes narrowed. “A’ight, Sandrene. Enjoy the rest of your day too, sweetheart.”
He winked at me then walked out of the office. The moment he left, I had to excuse myself to the restroom. I’d noticed his birthday was next weekend as I looked over his paperwork, and it was at that moment I decided that if he showed up at the club, I would give him something he would never forget.
After wetting a paper towel, I stared at myself in the mirror as I patted my face with it to cool myself off. My cheeks were slightly rosy. I was more than sure he noticed. “Get it together, Sandrene,” I said aloud.
I wanted to give him my number so badly, but I didn’t know if I could trust him. My identity had to stay a secret since I worked with mostly men. The last thing I needed was my coworkers showing up at the club. Most of them were older white men, so I knew Club Onyx was one of the last places I would see them at, but I had to be careful. Had Jamel seen my face, he would have addressed me as Obsession, and that would have caused my heart to vacate the premises.
* * *
“Girl,you working hard! What’s up? This routine seems complicated as hell. Who you tryna impress?”
I rolled my eyes then turned to Desire. That bitch was always in my business. She was a backstabber. I knew that much about her. None of the women in here could stand her. Although I didn’t really interact with anyone, I heard the gossip. I only smiled at her, refusing to answer her question. I was practicing my routine for Jamel’s birthday. This past weekend, he and his friend had shown up at the club, as usual.
I had one of the bouncers tell his friend that one of the strippers had something planned for his birthday Saturday night and to make sure he was in attendance. I’d chosen to dance to “Drunk In Love” by Beyoncé. It really spoke to my feelings about him except the being in love part. I was in serious lust, and I wanted to experience everything he had to offer.
After realizing I wasn’t going to answer her, she sucked her teeth and walked off. I’d never even so much as spoken to her, so I didn’t know why she thought I would tell her even a single word of my business. I continued practicing, incorporating some of Beyoncé’s dance moves from the video, especially the side-to-side bounce she did.
I’d worked up a sweaty mess just imagining that Jamel was sitting in front of me the entire time. My mask was completely wet. None of the dancers here even knew what I looked like. The only person besides the owner that knew was Leilani, one of the bartenders. That was by sheer accident. I thought I’d locked the bathroom door, and she walked in on me as I was blending my makeup.
I made her promise to keep that to herself, and so far, she had. That was nearly a year ago. We talked from time to time whenever we crossed paths. She was about the only person I even attempted to hold a conversation with. She seemed like a sweet woman. She stayed out of everyone’s way, just as I did, but she knew everybody’s business. She said that was so she could know who she was dealing with. I didn’t blame her.
As I gathered my things to head home, one of the bouncers arrived. The club would be opening in the next hour, so I had to get out of here. I often came to practice during the week before the doors opened. I’d get my ideas together at home and visualize what I wanted the routine to look like, then come here and put it together on the stage. I usually practiced twice a week, but this was my fourth practice this week. I wanted to make sure that it was memorable for Jamel. His friend had begged to know who was surprising him, but I told Jeff to keep it a secret. Under no circumstances was he to tell him it was me.
“You need me to walk you out, Obsession?”
“Please? Thanks, Jeff.”
He smiled at me then grabbed my bag from me. The time hadn’t changed to Daylight Savings time yet, so it was already dark outside at only six. You could never be too careful these days. “You’ve been here every day this week. When is the surprise performance again?”
“Saturday, but I know I can’t practice my routine tomorrow. I refuse to shower here and risk someone seeing me without my mask.”
“Why is it so important that no one knows what you look like though? You don’t think that’s extreme?”
I took a deep breath as I reflected. “It is a bit, but I have my reasons.”
I started stripping when my mama was still alive. I would have died if anyone had approached me that way in front of her. She didn’t know I was stripping. She knew I worked at a club, but she assumed I was a waitress or bartender, and I didn’t tell her any differently. She would have been embarrassed and totally disappointed to know that I was sharing my body with whoever wanted to see it. While that wasn’t how I viewed what I did, I didn’t want her to feel as if I was disrespecting her and the way she raised me to carry myself like a “virtuous woman.”
My mama was religious and spiritual. She wasn’t overly judgmental, but she had her moments. I supposed we all did, depending on what we found acceptable. Stripping surely wasn’t a respectful job in her eyes, but it helped keep food on our table and it wasn’t illegal. It wasn’t like I was fucking any of those men. I was only giving them something to fantasize about.
When I got to my car and unlocked the doors, Jeff placed my bag on the back seat for me. “Well, you enjoy the rest of your evening, Obsession.”
“I’ll try. Have fun tonight.”
He chuckled as he opened my door. “If that’s what you call it. See you tomorrow.”
I smiled at him and went home to get ready for work in the morning. However, my nerves were starting to get the best of me. I knew what I wanted to do Saturday, but I hoped I would be able to execute it.
CHAPTER3
