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Keelie and Bear nosh on nachos, as do Charlie and Max who just appeared on the scene, Naomi and Cormack are chatting incessantly, seeing that Cormack has already inhaled her nachos—and well, Naomi doesn’t do carbs, or cheese, or fun.
Carlotta waves at someone just past me.
“Here’s your pappy, Lot Lot,” she says before sticking her fingers into her mouth and belting out an ear-piercing whistle.
“Please don’t refer to Mayor Nash as my pappy,” I say, but the thumping, heart-stopping music drowns me out.
“Pappy!” Charlie jumps out of her chair and gives Mayor Nash an enthusiastic hug.
They’ve been close as of late.
It’s odd for me to see their relationship on the fast track. Even though I’ve known Mayor Nash a heck of a lot longer, we seem to be stalled.
I’m about to make small talk with him, but before I can do just that, a small army of nearly naked waitresses—wearing nothing but G-strings and pasties—delivers platters upon platters of fresh nachos for one and all.
Noah and Alex are quick to attack a platter, as do Everett and I.
When in raunchy Rome.
We get about halfway through when my mark shows up for the night.
Sorry to break it to Cormack, but Danya Swanson is the exact reason a majority of us are here this evening.
Lily is the first to greet her, and judging by the tight smiles and curt nods, it seems the bad blood between those second cousins twice removed runs both ways.
Everett ticks his head her way and I nod as we watch the woman take a seat next to my mother as they share a plate of cheesy chips.
Noah leans my way. “Remember, I’ll be right there with you.”
“You bet,” I say just as Meg takes to the stage.
The raucous music comes to an end and the half-naked honeys surrounding her run for the hills.
Meg is dressed in a short black dress, fishnets, and combat boots.
Oddly enough, it’s the same outfit I’ve seen her wear to church on Sundays.
“Good evening one and all,” she hums into the microphone. “Since we’ve got a few extra guests here tonight, I thought we’d do something fun. How about a few of you gentlemen come up on stage and we’ll have the girls give you the special treatment?” She flicks her finger at the men at our table.
“I’m out,” Everett says. “Jed is right, I can’t afford any more humiliation than I’m already subjecting myself to.”
Alex chuckles. “I can afford all the humiliation those girls can dole out.” He taps Noah on the back. “Let’s go, buddy.” But Noah hesitates at the offer. “Don’t tell me you’re too chicken.”
Noah’s chest broadens a notch.
Calling Noah a chicken is a surefire way to get him to do just about anything you want. I should know, I’ve utilized this tried-and-true tactic many, many times before.
“Fine.” Noah hops up onto the stage with Alex, as do Mayor Nash, Bear, Wiley, and Max. A stagehand brings them each a chair to sit on, and they look about as relaxed as one can get before a beautiful woman gets down and dirty right in their faces.
The music starts up again, and soon an entire infantry of scantily clad women in shimmering pink outfits prance out before them.
Meg scoops up a few items from the table before us, runs back on stage, and within seconds, each man has a bib tied around his neck, while a near-naked beauty shakes a rattle in his face and bottle feeds him.
All the while, the rest of the girls on stage carry on with their raunchy routines, much to the crowd’s delight.
Cormack, Keelie, Charlie, and just about every woman at the table is recording the entire event for posterity. And I have a feeling not one of those men will ever live this down.
“Good move not going up there,” I say to Everett. “I guess Jed is good for something after all.”
