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“Come on! Get a room!” Canyon called out.
I shook my head and let out a chuckle, but my body felt a little tense. It’s almost like I couldn't look away from them… because you could tell they were really in love… And for the first time in my life, I felt an uncomfortable twinge of jealousy. I wanted someone to touch me like that, look up at me like that, love me like that.
I closed my eyes tightly against it and thought for the hundredth time that maybe coming back here wasn’t such a good idea.
I was used to feeling anger, but I constricted it to the ice, and it worked for me. It’s what compelled me to throw the big hits and score the important goals. Other than that, I was an even keel. Nothing phased me. I honestly didn’t feel much, and I’d been like that ever since I left this place…
It was Claire who always had a way of making mefeelmore… and I’d forgotten about that…
________
The jealousy I felt over Grey and Jules’ lovey dovey shit was nothing compared to the jealousy I felt about a half hour later when everyone started skate-running out onto the ice. I pulled my hoodie up over my head and crutched my lame ass over to the teamboxes.
I watched sullenly as the boys skated around for warm-up laps while joking around with each other.
Grey, holding a bucket of pucks, skated across the ice to join me by the box, but his eyes were on Jules, who was now sitting in the stands under a blanket holding their little girl.
“She’s pregnant again.” He turned to me like a little boy who was caught telling a secret. His face broke into a small smile as he rubbed a hand over his face. “I can’t not tell someone and you’re not friends with my wife really, so… Don’t tell anyone. I’m just so fuckin happy, man. I didn’t think I could be this happy.” He dumped the bucket of pucks out onto the ice in front of us for kids to come take. “You gotta girl?”
“Nah,” I chewed the inside of my cheek. “My sister just had her second baby though. Babies are exciting. I’m not cut out for serious relationships though.”
He looked me up and down for a second before turning away. “Ah, one of those guys,” he snickered.
Something in the way he said it pissed me off. He didn’t know me. He didn’t know what I witnessed my sister go through. He didn’t–
But my rebuttal was lost in my throat as soon as I saw Claire’s strong self enter into the viewing windows of the upstairs weight room.
“Ohhh, now that makes a lot more sense.” Grey looked down at his skates and chuckled to himself. He leaned back against the boards and crossed his skates at the ankle.
“What does?” I snapped.
He nodded toward the workout room. “I remember you guys.”
That took me by surprise. “Huh?”
He squinted up at her. “Yeah… She used to be a blondie right?”
I felt my jaw tighten but was extremely curious about what he remembered.
“After I went pro, I came back here to work in the summers. I was pretty banged up and battling my own demons, so you guys were just annoying kids to me. And you two werealwaysbickering in the weight room. Craig would always be disciplining y’all.” He laughed then.
“What?” I demanded.
He shook his head. “I just remember this one time she punched you in the eye and you just stood there.” He chuckled. “You just looked shell-shocked. Had a shiner for a couple weeks after that too.”
I smirked at the memory. “Yeah, sounds like us.” I didn’t even see her rage punch coming. That was the summer before middle school. Claire had it in her head that Coca-Cola was alcohol. It was no secret that her and her sister were kinda sheltered, so I kindly corrected her, and it really pissed her off. I learned later, during one of those missed English classes, that one of her mother’s friends told her that in order to get Craig in trouble with the court during her parents’ messy divorce so that her mother could get full custody.
“She’s a piece of work.” He nodded to the weight room.
I instantly felt my shackles raising at that. If that was an insult, he better think again because–
“In a good way,” he added quickly. “Jeez, slow your roll man.” He studied me closer, and I felt awkward under his gaze, but I wanted him to continue… I wanted any piece of information on her that I could get. “She’s mentally tough. Jules says it all the time. Thinks she’s someone to watch. She and her old partner got second at Nationals last year, did you know?”
I didn’t have to tell him that I didn’t know, he could see the surprise on my face. And it bugged me. I hadn’t kept track of anyone from home since I left, and I was starting to majorly regret it.
“Well, she’s probably too good for you anyway,” Grey grubbed.
I snapped my neck up to meet his eyes, but he was already gone, skating away. Did he really just say that? What did that mean? I grinded my teeth together, trying to figure out something to say back to defend myself, but I couldn’t think of anything really, except…
