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“So… now that I have you here, and you cannot move because Indie isfinallysleeping, what’s going on with you? Why are you all bummed out lately?”
I shook my head. “Nothin.”
She gave me a look that said she didn’t believe that at all. “Griff told me something about a little blondie pairs skater…” she fished.
“She’s not blonde anymore,” I quickly corrected, then regretted it. She smiled like she was oh so satisfied with herself for being right. I rolled my eyes at her.
“Well, what’s going on with you two?” she urged.
I sighed. “I asked to be friends, she thought I meant more than friends. She then gotveryoffended that I was with another girl–”
“Wait, wait, wait… Did you make it seem like you wanted to be more than friends?”
I looked at her like she was crazy. “I don’t know. I fricken said ‘friends.’”
Sav shook her head at me like I was dumb. “Well, she likes you, and she could probably tell that you like her, so she probably thought you two would get together.”
“That’s exactly what she thought. Then she got with someone else, and that made me mad, so then I marched outside to stop her from hooking up with him–”
“You did what?!” she practically screeched at me. “You can't have your cake and eat it too!”
I squirmed away from her. She looked angry with me. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Well, if you wanted to be with another girl, then you shouldn't have cared that she was with another guy. The fact that you marched out to stop her shows that she was right and that you did give off the vibe that you wanted to be more than friends.”
I stopped and rubbed a hand over my face. “My brain hurts.”
She shook her head at me disappointingly.
“Well, now she’s ignoring me,” I told her.
She pursed her lips. “And how do you feel about that?”
I blew out a sigh. “Fucking terrible. I just watch her and it’s so… so…” I struggled to explain it to her because it made me feel too weak. But the truth was, I hated it. I felt like all the potential between the two of us was burning to the ground, and I was powerless to stop it.
She smirked. “This sounds like a Taylor Swift song.”
“Everything sounds like a Taylor Swift song to you,” I pointed out.
“Duh,” she told me like I was a young kid who was totally clueless. “There is one for every life occasion, little brother. Listen to ‘The Story of Us’ later,” she advised.
I coached myself not to roll my eyes. Maybe she had a point, and I needed all the help I could get.
Sav pushed off the couch and reached to retrieve Indie, but I shook my head and swatted her hands away. This was the most at peace I’d felt in a long time. There was just something about holding a sleeping baby.
Sav laughed. “Guess I’ll go find Griff and Johnny. Give me a holler if she wakes up.”
I nodded. God knew I wouldn’t be able to walk her around if she started crying.
17.Duke
Craig started expecting me to lock up every day because I made a routine of staying ‘til close… But now, Claire just slyly avoided coming through the lobby on her way out. Instead, she used the secret exit only rink regulars knew about– through the zamboni doors.
My jaw clenched every time I saw her leaving on the security camera. She knew I was watching her too, because she’d look directly at the camera and flip me the bird with a sassy smirk on her face.
That was alright. She didn’t have to like that I stayed here to watch over her from a distance. The rink was my place of employment, so I was allowed to be here. Plus, I was doing it more for my own benefit than hers anyway. That Jacques douche was probably harmless, but when I tried to walk out early on Tuesday, extreme panic starting rising up in my chest. I knew I wouldn’t be able to calm down unless I walked back in the rink to make sure she was alright.
The crazy thing about it is that I’d never experienced anxiety before this. Now I understood my teammate TJ’s fiancée, Ellie, a bit better. Ellie was a power skating instructor for the Crewman and every season she gave a presentation on how to handle anxiety and nerves before games. I always blew it off and laughed to myself about it because nothing ever shook me. I actually pitied the guys who got the shaky nerves. But now, I wished I would’ve paid more attention to the tips she gave… because this feeling sucked ass.
