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“Well, I know hooking up wasn’t the cause of it or anything, but I guess it isn’t that funny when you consider how I’m scared to do it again…” I trailed off.
He looked like he was going to throw up.
“Oh… you didn’t think about that yet, did you?” I asked.
“No,” he said firmly. “Only you, Claire Kessel, could make me afraid of hitting girl’s organs during sex.”
“I guess I’m not a normal girl,” I said sassily.
And that finally made him crack. He finally laughed. “Nope. That is one thing you are not.”
He stayed in my room for a while after that, telling funny hockey stories from over the years we were apart. The best one included his now famous shampoo prank, where he’d continually dump shampoo on rookies’ heads over the stall while they showered. They had their eyes closed, so it usually took a very long time for them to figure out what was really going on. As he talked, I was so relaxed that I was beginning to struggle to stay awake when my door opened, and a doctor poked her head in.
“Duke Callahan?” she asked.
I cut my eyes to his. Why was he being called on by a doctor?
As soon as I looked at him, flashbacks of last night slammed into my brain.
“Your foot!” I slapped a hand to my head. I’d totally forgotten that he walked on his cast. “Why did you carry me?!” I whispered-yelled at him.
“I wanted to be your hero, duh,” he said, shrugging off my concern with a lopsided grin. He stood on his good foot and leaned down to kiss my forehead again. “Don’t stress about it. I’d do it again in a heartbeat,” he whispered. “I’ll be right back. Team doc wants some x-rays sent over.”
I watched him head out the room feeling incredibly guilty, but also incredibly loved by him.
32.Duke
Routine appendectomies usually only required a day or so in the hospital, but leave it to Claire to go above and beyond expectations. Because hers had ruptured and caused other complications that I didn’t fully understand, she ended up having to stay in the hospital for five days.
That was rough for a girl like Claire– hell, it’d be rough for me too. Neither of us liked to sit still that long. Craig was going out of his mind trying to keep her calm and in her bed, but I had an easier go of it. Every day after my shift at the rink was up, I’d head over to the hospital, and every day I’d hoist myself up into her hospital bed to lay next to her. We’d play rock, paper, scissors to see who got to choose what to watch, and after about a half hour of cuddling and giving her head massages– she loved when I played with her hair– she’d be peacefully snoozing against my chest.
I cherished these moments because I knew I was stealing time with her. I breathed in the scent of her hair and tried to memorize the feeling of her warm body wrapped around me, because… I loved it… And I knew I was going to lose it soon.
I tried to think of her as someone else’s future significant other. Someone else’s future wife. But I couldn't do it. I selfishly wanted her. I think I’d wanted her and thought of her as my future ever since we were little kids, and that was hard to change.
I wouldn’t break things off with her until she was better, but I knew I had to do it…
It would hurt us both badly to begin with… But she’d get over me. She’d find someone else. She’d besafewith someone else.
And I’d always remember this summer as the one that harshly reminded me of why I was only a hook-up guy and not cut out for relationships.
_________
The morning Claire was discharged, Griff drove me over to Craig’s house so I could make sure she was doing alright. He waited in his car while I crutched up their walkway. He would be taking me to the airport right after I said goodbye to her. I put off getting checked out by the team doc and making an updated recovery plan for as long as I could. But I knew if I didn’t get back to Detroit, my ass would get handed to me by Coach.
Unfortunately, when Craig answered the door, he put a finger to his lips in a shush motion… Apparently she had a pretty painful night because she was trying to wean off the more powerful pain meds and she hadn’t slept much, so she’d been napping ever since they arrived home.
I made my way to her room as quietly as I could and cracked open the door.
My heart clenched at seeing her cuddled up in her twin bed. I wanted more than anything to climb in behind her and hold her against me… but I knew I couldn't…
My life in Detroit was waiting for me…
______
When my plane finally landed, I shot off a text to TJ letting him know, and he quickly replied that he was already on his way to the airport. He and Ellie had offered to drive me to my appointment.
After making my way through the freezing cold airport, I waited outside in the nice summer breeze for them.
