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“Oh god, yes,” Ana says, breaking into her own round of laughter. “They’d be so intimidated. But they’d love it. I can hear all of them asking you to step on them as we speak.”
“Oh, cut it out.” Maggie snorts, but it’s clear she likes the idea. “But who knows? Maybe a trip to New York is in the cards sooner rather than later.” She tips back her glass, finishing her drink. “What about you, Sasha?” She raises an eyebrow. “Your dating life can’t be as dry as you made it sound earlier, surely—”
“Maggie!” Caterina exclaims, but I wave at her, letting her know it’s okay. Normally it might have put me on edge, especially with how I’ve been feeling lately, but I have enough of a buzz to take it in the spirit that I think it’s intended. And considering all the other women are gossiping about their love lives, it’s fair, at the very least.
“It’sexactlythat dry,” I tell her ruefully, reaching for the pitcher of strawberry margarita. “As in, I’ve never been on a date. So I have nothing to contribute to this conversation, unfortunately.”
Maggie’s eyes go round. “Never. Girl, you’re way too hot for that. You’re fuckinggorgeous. You should have guys lining up—”
“She has a crush on Max,” Sofia says, and Caterina fixes her with a glare that clearly sayswe talked about this privately, not for you to share at girls’ night.
“Sofia!” Caterina hisses, but once again, I’m just tipsy enough to not be furious that someone has been discussing my secrets. Iama little embarrassed, though, as everyone’s eyes turn to me, and I flush pink.
“Wait—” Maggie frowns. “Isn’t that the priest—”
“Formerpriest,” Ana supplies helpfully. “But he still behaves as one. And you don’t need to look so embarrassed, Sasha. Any of us that have spent any time at all around the two of you in the same room know that you’re both nursing crushes on each other.”
Somehow, that information hits me harder than anything else. Caterina had mentioned that she’s seen how Max looks at me, but thatothershave noticed it makes my heart stutter in my chest.If people who aren’t around us every day are seeing it, doesn’t that mean something?
“Oh, honey.” Maggie looks at me sympathetically, instantly dashing any thought I might have had that the others might encourage my crush on Max, instead of discouraging it as Caterina had. “Apriest? That’s really hot and all—trust me, we Boston Irish Catholic girls get that like no one else, but it sounds like a dead end. Especially if he’s sticking with the whole celibacy thing.”
Suddenly, I wish I had something even stronger than the tequila-heavy margaritas, whatever that might be. “My therapist keeps telling me I need to try to date,” I murmur. “But it seems really daunting, and—”
“Have you tried dating apps?” Maggie raises an eyebrow. “They’re shit a lot of the time, but it at least mostly lets you weed out the weird ones before you actually waste your time.”
“No, I—”
“Okay, come here.” She scoots to one side on the sofa, closer to Saoirse, and pats the space suddenly made between her and Sofia. “Lemme see your phone.”
“What! No, I—”
“It’ll be fun!” Sofia giggles. “Ana and I used to play this game when she was dating in New York! She’d swipe through guys with me and we’d make a whole game out of it. It doesn’t have to be serious, promise.”
“It really was fun,” Ana agrees. “You could at least see what’s out there! What your type might be—”
I glance at Caterina, wondering if she’ll be the one to be the voice of reason, but she just shrugs and smiles gently. “It could be fun, Sasha. Better than trying to figure it out on your own.”
Nerves ball up in my stomach, but I finally nod, sliding onto the couch between them as I pull my phone out of my pocket. After I unlock it, I hold it out to Maggie, who instantly goes to the app store and downloads Tinder. I can feel my heart in my throat, feeling vaguely panicky, but deep down, I know this isn’t a bad idea. It’s better to rip the bandaid off here, with friends, making a game out of it, than alone and nervous in my room where I’d probably never get up the nerve anyway.
Maggie starts creating my profile, flicking through the photos in my phone to find one for my picture. “Okay—we need to find one without kids in it—here!” She pulls up a selfie I’d taken while on a walk in Central Park last fall, when it had looked particularly gorgeous out. My hair is loose around my face and I’m wearing the tiniest bit of makeup, but I have to admit I do look happy, pretty, and relaxed in the picture.
“Interests?” Maggie’s fingers hover over the keyboard.
“Um—” I try to think of what I like to do on the days when I’m in the city or not watching the girls. “Reading? Yoga?”
“I can work with that.” Maggie spends a few seconds furiously typing a bio as Saoirse and Sofia crane their necks around me to see what she’s writing. She sets my location to Manhattan, and a second later, as she finishes the profile, the first guy pops up on the screen.
“Ooh.” Sofia wiggles her eyebrows, looking at the dark-haired, impressively chiseled man who seems to have forgotten his shirt in every picture. “I like Greg.”
“That’s because Greg looks like Luca,” Caterina says, laughing as she peeks at the screen. “Or at least the discount version of him.”
“Sasha?” Maggie glances at me, grinning. “Right or left?”
I shake my head mutely, suddenly feeling my heart racing, as if any of this really meant anything. Maggie swipes left, and another man, this one a bit less intimidating, with curly brown hair and an outdoorsy look, pops up.
“He looks fun,” Saoirse says, eyeing the screen, but I shake my head. I also veto guys three, four, and five, until Maggie lets out a sigh, looking at me.
“You can’t hateallof them, Sasha.”
