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Everything you think is yours is not. It was borrowed. It could be taken from your wanting palms.
In their sophomore year, Valerie fell in love for the first time. His name was Gregory, and he was all things beautiful. He liked to smile at Valerie in the English class they shared, and before long, he was leaving notes in her locker, walking with her between classes. Every day brought a new thrill.
Until Serendipity found out.
She told Valerie she was too good for him. He was dirty, but she was finally almost clean. She had covered for her many times, so close to atonement.
The game, so clear to Valerie now, had held her hostage. Serendipity hovered, ensured Valerie wasn’t lingering in the halls with the boy she liked.
Serendipity had been in Valerie’s bones.
Two weeks later, Serendipity let Gregory finger her in the back of the school bus.
They sat together at lunch. He walked Serendipity to her classes.
And Valerie was a shadow. A mistake.
Valerie never said a word about her loss. She was dirty. And she believed it justified the screams, the revenge she took. And it felt true when the man with the scar took her away from her life, away from those who would punish her for what she did to Gregory and Serendipity.
These were thoughts Valerie wouldn’t allow herself to indulge in very often. The memories became hazier and hazier with each passing year.
But sometimes the images gripped her. The sounds woke her. And on those mornings she woke covered in sweat, her back aching, she wished she wouldn’t have woken up at all.
After pulling herself into the shower and washing away every dirty feeling in the dark as tears streamed down cheeks, Valerie shook her head and closed her eyes, firmly shutting the door to the past.
When she stepped out of the shower, reaching for a clean town, she smiled into the mirror after her hand wiped the steam away. She was reset. New.Serendipity meant a beautiful fate. She never deserved the name.
The Steele Heart Trailer Park felt clean before the sun rose. Valerie liked to drink a hot mug of coffee on the tiny front porch each morning before heading to the café. She sat on the steps as the world woke up, the sounds of birds singing and distant cars on the highway her soundtrack.
She was working a later shift that day, so she slept in ever so slightly. And when she opened her front door after dressing, she squinted into the early morning light.
She preferred the dark.
She preferred the illusion that the world was fast asleep.
Before her, the lime green trailer across from their driveway was quiet—as every trailer in the park was on weekend mornings. There was a large dumpster in the front yard, and a haphazard couch hung off the porch.
As Valerie sat down with her mug, she remembered the park owner had hired a few men to clear it out. While bringing in groceries the previous evening, Valerie had heard them saying they were tired of cleaning out thetrashand complained about the needles they found under the bed.
She’d smelled what they cleared from the trailer. Animal feces. Rotten food.
The trailer park was a mixture of townsfolk. Right next door to the now vacanttrashtrailer was a sweet little doublewide.
Valerie had heard that living in the only trailer park in town meant she lived on thebadside of town. But she mused that Hart Hollow was too small to offer much of a definitive line between the good side of town and the bad. Everything blended together.
There was a large house behind their trailer that sat just through the trees. It overlooked the trailer park and the cemetery and was only separated from the supposed trash by the elderly trunks and branches whispering toward the sky.
She would’ve loved to rent a house like the one so close. But she’d wanted to blend in, so they’d rented a trailer instead. It was a temporary fix—she’d dreamed of living outside of town, away from people. Though she did still keep a knife on her at all times, the convenience and warm safety of living in town snuck up on her.
Nicholas could walk to school, and she could avoid school drop-offs.
She could avoid buying him a car, and the nagging feeling that if he had one, he would leave her and the town behind.
She knew he wanted the freedman a car promised. And Valerie wanted him to be ready to start his own life when he turned eighteen, but she wasn’t prepared to let him go.
Playingmotherhad not been part of her plan.
Leaving the ranch with Nicholas had not been part of the plan.
