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She was not human.
The girl next door was not human, and I was in love with her.
I was in love with the blood that soaked her in dreams, with the way she made me hurt in the softest places. I was in love with an unearthly thing, and I felt my wrongness seep out when I was among my friends.
When Kyrie looked at me, I reached into my sleeve, running my finger over the friendship bracelet she had given me. I’d asked her if she would make one for the Clement siblings. And she dodged the question every time.
“I don’t want to feel like this,” she said, leaning in. “I want to go back to normal.”
I thought of my first day, just a few short months ago. I’d wanted a fresh start, and I got fresh horrors—my first fall into desire. And I got these people. These friends.
“Did you tell her she was the fresh meat? Did you tell her what would happen?” I almost smiled but held it back.
Jessica rolled her eyes at Kyrie. “You gonna be lookout when they TP her house?”
Kyrie mocked a shocked face, and Nicole smiled. For a fleeting moment, we slipped into normal. The voices around us were lulling and comforting. The smell of the food and the laughter, it almost made me believe I’d never seen Sorina’s fangs. Never seen the black of her eyes.
Never wanted to walk arm and arm with her into the gym.
I looked across the lunchroom to Lauren. She was leaning against the wall, rifling through her book bag. When she looked up, her eyes went to Kyrie. Kyrie who made every new student feel at home. Kyrie who was funny and kind and judgmental and real. The new girl’s eyes landed on me, and I smiled at her, then looked at my friends.
I looked at Kyrie then, and before I could stop myself, I reached across the table to place my hand on hers. “You should be her friend. Everyone needs friends,” I said, and Jessica did not scoff this time.
The lunch bell rang, and we stood, walking back to our lockers.
Kyrie hung back and walked with me. “Maybe you should ask Lauren to be your date for the formal,” she said, looking up at me.
“Absolutely not,” I replied.
“Why? Who else would you take?”
Sorina’s name hung in the air like an omen, but I didn’t say it. It was a game I played. I wanted to see if she lingered in their minds, or if she drifted away. She often vanished and was only real to my friends when I brought her up. I wondered if it was some sort of magic, something dark. How else could someone—a being such as her—survive in this world if people didn’t forget her?
I shrugged away my thoughts, vowed to work them into a story, and looked at Kyrie. “Let’s all go as friends.” I was reluctant to add another to the group, but what we all were to each other was changing. I had the key to something, and I was reluctant to let it free. They would think I was insane. They would think I needed help. They would leave me behind, just as Valerie had.
“Okay. I’ll talk to her.” Kyrie smiled. “Lets all meet at the trailer park.”
It did something to my heart to see her smile like that. I wanted that for my friends. Normalcy of some sort. So I told myself I would keep my secret, even if it ate me alive. And I would go talk to the one person I knew would not think I was going insane.
* * *
After school, I took a walk across town in the daylight.
I needed wheels. That much was apparent, but it hadn’t been a priority when we arrived, and I’d wanted an excuse to explore the town.
But now, with Valerie rarely home, I knew it was time to broach the subject. I knew we had money stored, and I was half tempted to help myself to it. But I also knew I needed a job if I was going to sever the cord entirely between myself and Valerie. Relying on her for the past two years had been like breathing. We relied on each other in silence, in ease. But now it felt like a crutch. Or a cage.
And I didn’t like the idea of being caged.
When Moonies was in sight, I sped up, crossing the bridge over Casador Lake at a brisk run. I hesitated when I made it across the highway to the gas station that sat between Moonies and Diana’s place.
I could hear music from the derelict bar, and smoke came from the chimney of Diana’s house.
I walked to her front door, clearing my throat as I knocked.
She didn’t answer the door, but a loud whistle sounded behind me. I turned to see Diana at the entrance of Moonies, waving me over.
I jogged past the gas station pumps to her, slowing when I saw her raised eyebrow.
