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“I want to write a post warning bands about this, but it could backfire. Without proof, it’ll sound like we’re just spreading gossip because they’re stealing clients from us.” The anger and defeat in Iris’s voice is the finishing blow to my already dismal mood tonight.
“Yep.” It’s the only word I manage to utter, but my brain has at least a million to describe this situation.
All the positivity I’ve channeled these last few days in my work, looking for that turning point I desperately needed, slowly slips away, leaving a void in my chest. I might be the cause of the downfall of Jail Records, and I can’t do anything to stop it.
My father’s words telling me I’m a failure come back to mind, and, for the first time since becoming an adult, they hurt me to the core. The feeling of defeat, of being worthless, of being unable to do my job, takes over my heart and shows no sign of leaving. I don’t think I was just lucky these past ten years, the truth is I can’t hold my own with the big boys in this industry. The thought settles in my chest like wet cement and threatens to suffocate me.
“How is the research going?”
I look up at Aaron, who is studying me carefully. I can’t understand if he gave me this task as busy work or if he really needs someone to do it. He doesn’t seem particularly involved. It seems like a project with enormous potential that nobody wants to take on because it would be impossible to recoup expenses if it fails.
It’s been five days since Aaron put me to work on it, and I still haven’t been able to find anything. Maybe because I’ve also been thinking about the quick sex I had in his living room with his brother—probably the best sex of my life—and it’s hard to focus on anything else.
“I found a guy who swallows swords and blades of all kinds.”
He frowns. “Too bloody.”
“A girl who paints with her feet.”
“Too boring.”
He watches me, waiting for more, but after sifting through thousands of Instagram profiles and videos on TikTok, I don’t know what to think. I spent every day glued to my phone watching videos people made and posted online. How do they find the time to film all that content?
“That’s it?”
“What do you want me to say? You’re looking for someone who could be famous but isn’t yet, and who doesn’t even have an act ready. How about the woman who’s decorated the walls of her house with bottle caps to make a portrait of Leonardo DiCaprio?”
“Really?” He frowns with a mixture of surprise and curiosity.
“Look.” I turn my laptop around so he can see.
“It’s massive. How high is that ceiling? Twenty feet?”
I nod. “Would you really do a show about her?”
Aaron bursts out laughing. “No, I just wanted to see the masterpiece. I mean, it’s pretty awesome. How much did she have to drink to glue all those caps to the wall?”
I groan in frustration. “You know you’re not helping, right? Tell me to find some singers and I will, but with no clue about the show, I’m looking for a needle in a haystack.”
The grin on Aaron’s face is nerve-wracking. “So, you’re saying you’re in the wrong job? That your field is music?”
I cast a bored look at him. I know where he’s going with this. “If you’re trying to fire me again, it won’t work.”
His gaze becomes serious. “I know, sadly. I genuinely hope you’ll eventually go back to New York, but I can’t seem to get rid of you,” he scolds.
I shrug and smile as he enters his office, watching until he closes the door behind him.
The intern, who sits on the other side of the room, just outside Aaron’s office, gapes at me wide-eyed. She’s a twenty-year-old girl just out of college who sees Aaron as a god come to earth. Whenever he and I banter, she goes mute like she’s awestruck at our ability to joke around.
“Don’t worry, sooner or later you’ll work up the courage and realize he won’t bite if you talk to him.” I smile at her.
She looks down at her computer without saying a word and blushes. Probably, if I were looking for a job in this industry, I would be intimidated by Aaron too. He’s such an influential person, he can make or break your career. I’d be afraid of making mistakes and ruining my opportunity to move up in this industry.
The circumstances that brought me to this office make me reckless, and maybe even careless, because I know this job has nothing to do with my skill but Aaron’s guilty conscience for not being able to help his brother.
I bring my attention back to the phone and the computer in front of me and decide to give social media a second chance. I scroll through the videos and stumble upon a TikTok duet where a book blogger shows all the books ignored by BookTok, and saying why they deserve more attention. Typical video on this platform, but what catches my attention is the other half of the screen where a girl is playing the guitar as background music. It’s so heartfelt and fitting with the blogger’s words it almost makes me cry. I click on her profile and notice she has fifteen thousand followers. I start scrolling through her list of videos. She’s good on the guitar, but she also has a fantastic voice.
For a moment, Evan comes to mind. This girl would be perfect for Jail Records. She’s not famous, but she has great potential, and the record companies haven’t scouted her yet. Video after video, I become convinced she has the talent to make it big, and while I promised myself I wouldn’t think about my old job anymore, I send the link to Evan. Surely, he’ll be able to sign her.
