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She continues, walking one step closer to me. “It’s a bad look on him right now. You’re amazing and beautiful and hardworking, but you are his employee. A staff, a divisional head. The scandal it’s going to create will be fresh fodder for the media. Trust me, I know. I‘ve been doing this PR thing for a long time, I know the kind of stuff people love to feast on.”
I shake my head vigorously, refusing to process her words. A stupid idea pops into my head. “Victoria, Harrison and I are close friends but that’s just it. There’s nothing more.” I have to at least try to deny it, even though I know Victoria is too smart for that.
She huffs and laughs. “I’m a woman too, Charlee. I’m also very human and I know what passion looks like. Right now, in the middle of this damning lawsuit that could cost us the entire company, this is exactly the kind of secondary scandal that could set things off deeper into the flames. If you really care about Harrison, you have to re-consider this entire situation.”
I don’t know what to say as ten daggers knife through my heart. Victoria has no idea I’m already carrying Harrison’s child and her observation is this bad. My heart starts racing in trepidation. What would she say if she finds out about the pregnancy? Would I ever be able to handle the backlash from everyone else?
I’m lost in thought when Victoria starts speaking again. “Come on, it’s Harrison Bridges, lover boy extraordinaire. Where do you think it will all even lead to anyway?”
As soon as the words leave her mouth, I can see the regret flying past Victoria’s face.
She’s just implied that I’m not good enough to ever have anything real with Harrison.
“Charlee, wait… I’m sorry,” She’s calling out but I’m already on my way, walking as fast as I can, far away from her. I know I may not be the most sophisticated flashy woman out there, but I’m something. I’m someone! How dare she imply that I’m not good enough to share something real with Harrison?
I exhale deeply to keep the tears from flowing down my face. I’m crying a lot faster and more often these days. It’s exhausting being so emotional.
At the end of the street, just before I turn into my avenue, something beautiful catches my eye.
It’s a framed picture in a baby store. Through the glass, I can see cradles, cots, strollers, and stuffed animals, but that picture frame holds my attention the most.
“Little One, I loved you before I ever saw you. With every breath of my life, I will always love you.”
The tears finally start flowing down my face. Of course, babies can’t read, but it’s more of an affirmation for the parents.
My hand reflexively goes to my belly, and for the first time, I’m speaking to my baby as I rub it gently.
“It’s you and me against the world, Little One.”
I don’t know what life will throw at me in the coming months, but with every breath I can muster, I will fight for this child. I will defend my baby.
This isn’t the life I wanted, but it’s what I have now and I will have no regrets. Victoria is right. Harrison can’t deal with this presently, and so, I’m going to do it without him. He doesn’t have to know. I can’t ruin everything he’s worked so hard for. I can’t smear his reputation further–the boss who got an employee pregnant even before the business took off.
I can do this on my own.
I can do it.
18
HARRISON
“Buddy, this is the longest you’ve been MIA since moving back to New York. Come on, you’re missing out on all the fun!” Jules is drinking an obscenely expensive liquor straight from the bottle, holding his phone up as a few bikini-clad ladies twerk to loud music in the background.
We’re catching up on a video call and I’m watching him and Pete, my two close buddies from college having the time of their lives on a yacht. I can see strap-tiny bikinis and bare skin flashing everywhere, drinks and bites buzzing all around and it looks like a hell of a lot of fun. Normally, when I was working at Bridges, I could very easily take a short vacation to link up with my buddies. We would go wild with no restraint–young, rich, and absolutely free.
Right now, the sight of them having so much fun just makes me realize how much older I’ve gotten in the past couple of months. I’m not even seeing the allure of the party life anymore. My head is brimming with worries and looming fears and when I’m not busy, all I want is to hit the pillow and try to find a bit of sleep.
“Harrison, come on, buddy. You can’t keep beating yourself up over everything that’s going down at the company right now,” Pete says, stealing a kiss from a girl I have never seen before. I thought this clown was in a committed relationship.
“Bro, let me send my pilot to come get you. St. Lucia is a bomb place!” Jules says and chugs the bottle again. He runs a successful chain of old-money casinos and has access to the most luxurious things in life.
Even if he offers to send a golden chariot of fire to come get me, I’m not interested in leaving New York right now.
“Jules, buddy, I know you always have my back, but I’m not sure you guys get the picture of what’s at stake right now,” I say, adjusting my tablet in front of me. “It’s not just the company that’s getting trashed–everyone who’s attached to it is on the line. I can’t even think of stepping away from the heat. That’s why I’m the CEO. I have to brace myself and take the brunt of it.”
Pete sighs and shakes his white-blond head. “That’s the Harrison I’ve always known. Always willing to sacrifice himself and his mental health for the sake of the entire world. Bro, cut yourself some slack. You need a break. Even if it’s just one weekend.”
A dry smile spreads across my lips. “You know I appreciate your concern, brother, but I just wish I could. Don’t worry. I’m looking after myself over here. I got this, don’t let it bother you. Just have fun and enjoy yourselves on my behalf.”
