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“Don’t keep shutting down. Tell me the truth. Why me? Why not any other woman?”
He gets to his feet, stubbing out his cigar, walking over to a drinks tray. He pours a whiskey and downs it in one before turning to face me. “You want to know the truth?” he says. “You like movies? How about this quote? You can’t handle the truth.”
“Thought you might ask me to do the timewarp.” I can’t resist smirking.
“So she told you? I might have guessed.”
“Oh, don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me, Brad. Or are you more of a Riffraff?”
“Knock that off.”
“Don’t distract me. Why did you pick me to marry? Tell me the truth. What do you really want out of all this?”
“All right. What I want more than anything is to rip your clothes off and fuck you over this desk. I think about fucking you all the damned time, and it’s making it impossible to get any work done. I’m obsessed with you. It’s getting under my skin, and you have no idea your power over me. I need you in my life, but if you stayed in it, this life would destroy you like it will me. The only thing I hope to achieve is saving Alicia so she doesn’t end up like her mother or me.”
I walk over to the tray and pour myself a drink, taking a long gulp of it, doing my best not to cough it back up as it burns on the way down to my stomach. “Wow,” I say, coughing anyway. “That’s a lot to take in.”
“You wanted the truth. I was certain there was no such thing as love, and you’re making me think that maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I can love someone. Maybe I can see what it means to love someone. But I can’t have you stay in my life. You don’t know what my life is, what I have to do in my line of work. You would hate me forever if you knew. It would disgust you to know some of the things I’ve done over the years.”
“You’re making all these decisions on my behalf. I can make my mind up rather than you doing it for me.”
“I’m too old for you, Bex. You have a life ahead of you. That’s why I want to fund your boutique. I want to see at least one person get to live their dream.”
I take his hand in mine, squeezing it lightly. “What’s your dream?”
“To not look in the mirror and hate what I’ve become. To be able to let my emotions out without my enemies taking advantage. To sleep without waking up every ten minutes thinking someone is coming to kill my daughter to spite my father. When he dies, I have to take over, and I have to be strong. I will not let my brother or anyone else interfere with my plans.”
“How about you let your emotions out when you’re around me? You don’t have to do it in public. I won’t say a word to a soul. If this is my secret space, how about it’s yours too? How about you become the person I know you can be in this space?”
“And who’s that?”
“A good father. A good husband. A good person.”
“I am not a good person, Bex.”
“Maybe not, but you could be. I know you’ve got it in you. I see how you act around your daughter. Around me.”
“I hurt you, Bex. I’ve spanked you when you begged me to stop.”
“I’m still here, aren’t I?”
“Go to bed. I’m done with this conversation.”
“Fine. You want to shut this down. Go ahead, but I’ll tell you something. When we’re married, you’ll have to talk to me.”
I walk out of the study and head upstairs.
31
Bex
* * *
I’ve not made it up two steps before I hear footsteps behind me. I spin around, expecting an argument, but instead, Hunter grabs hold of me, plunging his tongue straight into my mouth.
I could push him away, but his touch is already doing things to me. I stumble back, falling onto the stairs. He lands on me. He smells of cigar smoke and tastes of whiskey, but his scent reaches into my soul, opening up parts of me that only open for him.
“I’m not the only one hiding things,” he says, pinning me in place with his arms. “I know you want me. You tell yourself you can’t get close because I’m a criminal, but the truth is you’re already too far gone. You know how good it feels to give yourself to me. You know how much you want me to punish you when you’re wrong, to reward you when you’re good.
