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AUTUMN
“We look ridiculous.” Jackson grumbles as he carefully adjusts himself in his seat.
I give him my best serious expression. “What? There’s nothing ridiculous about a huge swan shaped paddle boat.”
He gives me side-eye even though I can’t fully see his eyes behind his sunglasses. I can’t help it, I burst out laughing. Jackson is a big guy. At least, six-three is my guess. And with me sitting here at five-four, we probably do look a little ridiculous. I’m pretty sure our swan is listing a little on his side.
“Come on, it’s the perfect innocent outing. Very Home & Heart. I think I made a movie where my co-star and I were on a paddleboat. Or was it a kayak? Canoe? I don’t remember. But I do remember that the scene called for us to fall in the water. And do you know how cold bodies of water are in Canada? Even in the summer? Really freaking cold.”
He laughs softly at that.
“Seriously, I had a wetsuit on underneath my dress and it was still freezing. That was not a fun day at all.”
“Then I hope that means you don’t want us to fall in the water during this outing.”
“If it gets any hotter, I’m diving in.”
Sweat is pouring down the back of my neck already. Texas in August is no joke. The main reason I picked this outing was because it involved water.
“Actually, swimming isn’t allowed on this lake.”
“Seriously?”
“Yep.”
“Well, damn. Don’t need to be breaking any laws. This outing has to be all PG.”
We paddle a little in silence, but he keeps sneaking glances at me.
“Can I ask you a question?” he finally says.
“Sure.”
“Why are you so determined to keep making these Home & Heart movies?”
“Because they’re my bread and butter. I have a guaranteed job every year, sometimes two. I’ve done a Valentine and summer-based movie too.”
“Do you need the money that badly?”
“Not exactly. But being an actor isn’t only about making the movie. I have to hire a personal trainer and a ton of other people that help me look young and fresh. Then there’s headshots, and a million other things that add up. Not to mention that living in L.A. is expensive as hell. I need to remain relevant, or the scripts stop pouring in. I’m the only actor fromSunset Beachthat has had steady work since the show ended and I’ve already lost several considerations due to this scandal, I can’t afford to lose anymore. I could be cancelled for this.”
He snorts at that. “That’s ridiculous. People have literally launched careers due to sex tapes. There are far more scandalous things actors have done than a dirty voicemail.”
“Yeah, but they aren’t Home & Heart’s go-to girl. I built a career on being the girl next door.”
He looks at me then. “But that’s not who you are.”
His words pierce me like an arrow to the heart. It hurts, but only because he’s right. It’s not that I’m not a nice person or anything or don’t fit the good girl image at all, but I like pushing boundaries. My fans would be shocked to know I was in detention almost every week in high school. Because I dared to wear something against dress code. Or defaced some asshat’s locker because he thought it was funny to lift a girl’s skirt in the hallway. I used to be fearless. Not anymore.
Does Jackson really see past the facade I’ve erected?
“And who do you think I am?”
He stares at me for a beat before looking ahead. “That’s what I’m trying to figure out. Are you really the girl that’s shit at running away from trouble, or do you like to run toward it? Or is it something else?”
I raise my eyebrows. “And what is that?”
“You tell me.”
