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Perhaps it might be a good strategy to have the older woman’s advice. But how to begin? He moved across the empty dance floor and toward one of the windows. “How much do you suspect?”
Mrs. Peters snorted. “Enough to know what started as an honorable way to keep my lady safe from her brother-in-law has a chance to grow into something more if you will let it.” She followed him, and when she drew abreast, he peered at their reflection in the darkened window glass. “You are well on your way to being captivated by her, aren’t you?” There was no censure there, only understanding.
“Damn. I thought I’d been more subtle, that I’d put forth enough charm no one would see through the ruse.” He rubbed a hand along the side of his face and then pushed the fingers through his hair. “You won’t sound an alarm, will you?”
“I will not, but only if I have your promise you don’t intend to hurt Lady Ravenscroft.”
“That is the last thing I wish to do.” Curling a hand, he rested it on the glass and then leaned his head on the hand. “I suppose you know I didn’t come here as an out-of-work soldier.” It wasn’t a question.
“Oh, yes. That was readily obvious from the first.” Amusement wove through her voice. “The attraction between you and my lady was equally obvious.”
Perhaps it was best to have someone’s counsel on this matter. “I have been sent by the Home Office on a mission of sorts. Finding Belle, coming to know her, has been an unexpected boon, and as time goes on, yes, I am growing rather fond.”
“Can you see yourself with her for a lifetime, loving her as she deserves to be loved?”
A lifetime? “I don’t know, honestly, for I never thought I was a marriage-minded sort.” Hawk lifted his head and glanced at the housekeeper. “Was she truly happy as Ravenscroft’s wife? I’d rather not need to compete with a ghost…ifI should decide to pursue something real, that is.”
“Of course.” Again, Mrs. Peters chuckled, as if she knew a secret he didn’t. “My lady is someone who adores being in love, being needed, being appreciated, and she likes nothing more than to give all of that in return. While she did, indeed, love her husband with all that she was, Lord Ravenscroft was very much a man after his ancestors. He didn’t show much affection or emotion. He pursued outdoor activities more than he did her, especially after it became obvious they would never have children.”
“I assume she knows it wasn’t her fault?”
“I wouldn’t know, but I don’t believe it matters. The failure was hard on her for a few years, but she took his lack of intimacy—and I’m not talking of the coupling kind—to heart. Oh, on the outside she was lovely and charming, and she always put him in the best light when they entertained in London, but she wasn’t happy.” Mrs. Peters shrugged. “There were times when Lord Ravenscroft remembered that he had a wife, and for a few months he would pay her extravagant attention…”
“But it never lasted.”
“No, especially when they came here to this estate. Too many other things held his interest.”
Ah. No wonder Belle wished for excitement and adventure in her life. “She is still quite a vibrant lady.” As her kisses and enthusiasm for coupling had attested to the fact. Merely one facet of her he found enchanting.
“I agree with you. None of us liked to see her hide from everything here. For five years, she has removed herself from all she used to love.”
“Why? Is she afraid of society?”
“That, or perhaps she is fearful that another man might neglect her the same way her husband did. If you want my opinion, Captain, I think she fears more people leaving her life.” The housekeeper shook her head. “It takes a toll and deadens the heart.” Then she pinned him with a hard look. “Which is why I don’t want to see her hurt again. So if you are planning to break her heart once your mission has concluded, it is best to end it with her now before she completely extends her trust.”
Hawk turned fully toward her and then lightly dropped his hands on her shoulders. “Mrs. Peters, you have my word—as a gentleman and a soldier—that I will not hurt Lady Ravenscroft, but I do need to puzzle out my goals and how she’ll fit into them.” The life of a spy—even while not in war time—wasn’t conducive for romance. And there was every possibility that if he took a wife, she would be used against him, always in danger.
I cannot do that to Belle.
“Good. For the time being, I will keep your secret.”
“Thank you.” He stepped away and broke contact. “As for a gift, perhaps I should pop into some of the shops in the village to see if something catches my eyes.”
“My lady will adore dancing with you, but the best thing you can do is to provide companionship. That is what she wishes for over everything else.” A knowing twinkle lit her eyes. “And from what I have already witnessed, the two of you are quite content in that.”
Heat crept up the back of his neck. “She is… intriguing. Let’s leave it there.”
The housekeeper chuckled. “You are a good man, Captain Hawkins. I look forward to seeing how your relationship progresses.”
“Thank you. So do I.” Above all, he needed to decide what it was that he wanted for his life, and whether that would include Belle.
Later that afternoon, he found her in that same ballroom as she directed two of the footmen in the placement of fir boughs. In two corners, waterfalls of the paper snowflakes Hawk had made dangled from the ceiling on fishing line. Arrangements of hot house flowers rested on pedestals about the room, and their phantom floral scents wafted through the room. Groupings of ivy waited at each window where there would eventually be candles and other holiday decorations.
“Unless I miss my guess, Lady Ravenscroft, yours will be the most lovely, decorated ballroom this holiday season.”
In the weak sunlight that streamed through the windows, a faint blush appeared on her cheeks. “You are too kind, Captain Hawkins.”
He put his hand over his heart in mock offense. “I only speak the truth.” With a nod to the footmen, he said, “I’m sure you chaps won’t mind if I take the lady away for a few hours?”
