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I realize my face is hot, and then I realize it’s because tears are streaming down. Hot tears of shame, anger, and frustration.
A pair of strong arms wrap around me. “I’m sorry.”
37
SMALL TOWNS AND SHRINKAGE
JOSH
Instant shrinkage. Hard-on gone. Cassie’s mother showing up out of the blue and reaming her daughter out like that manages to not only spoil the moment, but the whole hour, day weekend it seems.
I shouldn’t have been surprised that thebrujashowed up here. Yeah, my personal, private nickname for her. Witch in Spanish. She’s that. A mega witch, if you ask me. It’s not a total surprise that her mother knew we were here. Even though we snuck in late on Friday night, undoubtedly at some point of time, someone would have seen Cassie and reported her appearance to her mother.
Small towns. Gotta love them. The gossip is in the town’s arteries. Its life’s blood. So that’s what put us where we are now. People talking. Talk, talk, talk.
I wrap my arms around Cassie and hold her. Hold her for what feels like forever. I lean against the mast and keep her tight against my body while her tears soak my T-shirt. When she finally lifts her head, she says, “Can I go home, please?”
Home. For a brief second, my mind thinks she means to her parents’ dwelling.
Then she adds, “To Austin,” and snuffles, blinking large, dark red-rimmed, bloodshot eyes.
* * *
Well,so much for those plans. A nice weekend on the boat and romantic walks on the beach. Yeah. Nada. Valentine’s Day was spent driving back from Boar’s Creek with a silent, sulking, tearful Cassie. As for me, I wanted nothing more than to kill her mother. I also didn’t get to have the talk with Cass that I planned to have. How do you go about revealing a secret as heavy as the one I carry when your lover, soul mate, love of your life, is beyond consolation.
Why the hell does she give a damn what her mother thinks about her anyway? If Cassie knew…
I shake those thoughts out of my head and keep driving up 111 on the way back to Austin.
And yet, as much as I push thoughts of her parents away, they keep returning like flies to shit.
It’s because of her father. That has to be it. She’s so broken up because her mother disowning her means she loses her father.
That, she can’t handle.
38
BEANBAGS AND TOPKNOTS
CASSIE
Last weekend was shit thanks to Mom. Now, it’s Thursday. I haven’t been able to concentrate on my studies. I don’t know why it matters to me so much that my mother’s cutting me out of her life. I didn’t call Jeremy or Liam to tell them what happened. I don’t want to bring them into the middle of this.
I called off sick from work. I skipped class. I’m moping around in my room, glad my roommates all have busy lives, and none of them have been around to witness my despair and my new state as a shut-in. I haven’t texted Josh, though he’s tried to reach out a couple of times. Luckily, he’s playing catch-up from the day and a half he missed at work, so I’m sure he’s not going to show up here until he’s caught up.
Suddenly, I notice there’s silence, and I glance at my iPad. There’s a message on the screen. The show I’m streaming wants to know if I’m still watching. Of course, I’m not watching. I’ve been streaming stuff just to have background noise in my room. I couldn’t even say what’s been on. I press on the button that readsyes,and the program resumes with the next episode.
And I still couldn’t tell you what’s on.
I lean back in the bean bag chair I’ve dragged to my room. The room I share with Riley, which, thankfully, she hasn’t been in much lately because she’s spending more and more time with Graham.
Blech. Graham. Still can’t stand him.
I close my eyes and let the sounds of the show fill the room while I try to shove all my dark thoughts away. Probably doesn’t help that I’m starting my period. Hormones plus Mother issues plus Despair equals…this.
A knock at the front door—which my room happens to be closest to—brings my attention away from the darkness and to the present. Not that I am going to answer the knock. My roommates wouldn’t knock. They’d text if they’d forgotten their keys. I check my phone. No texts.
Another knock.
