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Shecouldn’t.
And that was the problem.
Two
Time passed.
The first few months, Anneke would wake up and the first thing she’d wonder was ifitwould finally happen. Would he finally come back and wreak havoc again? She’d be on pins and needles the whole day, and she’d find herself watching the door, checking her phone, and looking around her when she was out. She’d find her heart beating hard all of a sudden, thinkingitwas going to happen any moment.
But it never did.
He never came.
More months passed. Nic’s wife Ayah suffered a miscarriage. Willem and Serenity hooked up, had a huge row, and got engaged. Jaak’s wife Ilse – then his girlfriend – had gotten into an accident that left her blind. Fleur passed admissions for a prestigious art school.
Life seemed to have turned into a rollercoaster of ups and downs for the de Konighs, and it was as if anywhere she looked, something was happening to everyonebuther. Her life seemed to have struck aPausebutton, and she just didn’t know what to do to make her life start playing again.
Each day began to feel tedious, and Anneke started wearing a mask again. But this time, it wasn’t because she was trying to get over the pain. This time, it was the opposite – and it was this that she couldn’t bear thinking about.
How could she wantitto happen?
How could she want to see him again?
To push someone away only to want that same person back – it was like something straight out of a romance novel. She’d have laughed if she could, would’ve laughed if only she didn’t find the realization so deeply shameful. Oh, how she would’ve laughed if only she didn’t knowitmade her the weakest woman in the world, to care for such a thing in spite of his betrayal.
And so the mask stayed, her heart gradually stopped beating so fast, and the pain faded a little bit more each day. Life returned to normal, and she began to convince herself that she could forget him – the way Marcus Ravelli had so easily and obviously forgotten about her.
****
IT WAS SUPPOSED TObe just another day at work when Anneke was called in to her eldest brother’s office. Or at least it was so until Willem had asked her to sit down before dropping the bombshell on her.
“I beg your pardon?” Anneke just couldn’t believe she had heard her brother right. But when Willem only raised a brow at her, she knew she hadn’t misheard him, and she shook her head incredulously. “I don’t understand. Marcus Ravelli has been our partner on this project from the start, and youneversaw fit to tell me?” Her words having gradually gained volume, Anneke was appalled to hear her voice turn unintentionally shrill by the end, and she quickly snapped her mouth shut. Her body was trembling hard – too hard – and she hastily tried to control this telltale reaction, too, taking deep breaths and willing herself to calm down.
Itfinally happened – no, wait – why was she still thinking like this?
Shouldn’t she have stopped caring aboutit?
