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After about twenty minutes, Cassandra still didn't have the courage to believe that he was back. She heard him leave but had not heard him return to the room. Of course, Cassandra figured that she just hadn't heard it. She had gone to the bathroom and run water. It could have happened at any of those times, and she likely wouldn't have heard a thing. The problem was that she could be wrong as well. As much as she told herself that it would be fine if he found out or not, the truth was Cassandra did not want to fight with her brother again. She did not want it to turn into the big deal that it had before. Sadly, she knew that it would though. How could it not?
Finally, she sat down on the end of the bed, a few minutes later lying down. She was waiting for the door next to her to open and close. That would signify that her brother was in his room, and she was free to finish what she had started with Steven. Cassandra made her mind up and nothing was going to stand in her way.
Apparently, the only thing that could stand in Cassandra's way was herself. She woke up with a start a couple hours later and the clock read 2:00 o'clock in the morning. There was no way that she could go over there now. He was probably asleep and whatever courage Cassandra had mustered up to make that decision was gone. She sat back in her bed, mentally yelling at herself for not doing anything. What a waste that was.
Chapter 25
Steven
The whole time they drove back home to Hartford, Cassandra sat behind Steven, and she kept giving him these looks. If it was from anybody else but Cassandra, he would know exactly what it meant, but Cassandra was different. He never knew what was going on with her, whether he was coming or going. She had a bland looking face, one that held mystery and just the right amount of mischief. He wanted to know what it was all about, but they had hours of road ahead of them, and Luke insisted on sitting in the front seat. He said that the back seat was just too easy to fall asleep in. Steven wouldn't mind his friend taking a little bit of a cat nap, so that he could have some one-on-one time with Cassandra. Maybe they could talk some of it through.
They dropped Cassandra off first, and it wasn’t like he could say anything. Steven told her goodbye and watched her get smaller in the rearview mirror. Luke wanted to know if he needed something to eat before they parted ways. Steven really wasn't in the mood, but he didn't have a good excuse not to.
They got burgers and Luke kept eyeballing him. When he asked what was going on, his friend shrugged. “It just occurs to me that you never really know somebody.”
That ambiguous answer came from somewhere. Steven didn't know where, honestly didn't care to know, but it mattered. Steven didn't just say things like that out of the blue and neither did Luke. Where was he going with that?
“You are probably right. Most people don't even know themselves, so to think that you can know somebody else would be laughable.”
“You always have an answer for everything, don't you?”
Steven wasn't sure where it was all going, but there were red flags and alarm bells going off in his head. Obviously, Luke had something on his mind, and the longer he refused to come out directly with it, the more nervous Steven became. He would rather know what was on Luke’s mind, instead of tiptoeing around. Tiptoeing never got anything accomplished.
“You going to tell me what's going on with you, Luke? You’ve been acting weird, buddy. Have been the last couple of days.”
Steven waited, but he didn't have to wait very long before Luke was telling him that he had overheard Cassandra and Steven’s conversation. Steven was relieved, not because it was finally out in the open or anything honorable like that. He was happy because he still had a clear conscious. They hadn't done anything so he could tell him honestly that they hadn't and not feel bad about it. He wasn't going to be asked if he wanted to, he was going to be asked if something was going on between him and Cassandra. There wasn't anything going on, nothing had happened, so Steven knew he was in the clear.
“Your sister and I are attracted to each other, that's it. There is nothing to tell you about. We both know that it's impossible, neither one of us wants to hurt you, so that's the end of it. I've gotten close to her, and you can probably admit how beautiful she is. It's hard not to want her just a little bit.” Steven thought that he might be going too far, even though he was leaving so much out. He was practically head over heels for Cassandra, but a partial truth was better than the whole truth on occasion and Steven kind of got a feeling that he was in one of those occasions.
Luke just kind of looked at him for a minute, surprise clear on his face. “I thought you were going to deny it.”
Steven chuckled. “I thought for a minute that I would too. If it would do me any good, I probably would have.”
Luke always liked honesty, even if it was sometimes hard to hear. Steven wasn't doing it all for the best reasons. He knew that admitting to some, would keep the accusations away from all. Either way it was looked at, it was a form of betrayal. Steven had not only fallen for his best friend’s sister, he’d danced with her, held her in his arms, and he had kissed her twice. If he had the opportunity, he would have done more, wanted to do more, and in time, Steven hoped that he would. Steven would never be able to admit to any of that. His friend would kill him. But he could admit to a small desire, a small need and unrequited love that would never be consummated. Deceitful or not, that's what could be confessed.
Even that tiny bit had Luke all up in arms. “She is my sister; you know how I feel about that!”
He agreed, but at the same time, it didn't change the way he felt about it, what he felt about her. Before when they were younger, before she ran off with Nelson, Steven started to care deeply for her. He thought that he loved her, but now he knew that wasn't true. It wasn't because he didn't care about her, it was just because he wasn't prepared for the deep level of love that he would have for her now. Whatever he felt before was so small in comparison to how she made him feel now. Steven wanted nothing more than to be with Cassandra. Talking about it so openly was more difficult than it appeared. He had told his friend a deep dark secret, but when he realized that it was so tiny in comparison to the truth, it was hard for him not to be full of nerves about it.
“I know, Luke. She knows too. She doesn't want to mess things up with the two of you. I think we would both like to see what would come of it, but you have kept that from happening. I mean, who she is to you has kept it from happening. We know that at the end of the day, nobody wants to betray you. However we feel toward each other doesn't matter. What matters is that we haven’t done anything.”
Luke nodded his head and agreed with the sentiment, which was helpful for Steven. He was sweating from having to say anything at all. Once he was dropped off, hopefully Luke was in a better state of mind. Maybe he would stop searching for the truth and what was really going on. He probably didn't need to know.
“Promise me that this is all in my head and that nothing's going to happen between the two of you,” Luke finally implored.
Steven grinned, though inside he was dying again. “You have nothing to worry about, Luke. Nothing is going to happen.”
Chapter 26
Cassandra
She had resolved to be with Steven. It was in her mind to do it and as soon as Cassandra made up her mind, it wasn’t going to be changed. Not only that, but she also wasn’t going to stop until she got what she wanted. They had dropped her off and within a few minutes, Cassandra was getting ready to go out again. She needed to see Steven. Her courage was waning, and it wouldn’t be long before she second guessed everything.
Luke getting in the middle of ruining her chances before was not seen by her as a sign. It was just one of many obstacles that she was prepared to jump over to get what she wanted. Cassandra had decided that letting Steven have his way with her was what she needed most.
Cassandra knew where Steven lived, sort of. She knew that he was just a few blocks away, so when she got herself prepared to go, she went in the direction where he lived. It wouldn’t take much for her to get there. Then, she would finally be able to finish what she started before. Cassandra wasn’t going to be comfortable until what was going to happen between the two of them played out. She was all nerves and anticipation at the moment.
She wasn’t sure exactly where he lived, but Steven had distinct taste and his car stuck out to Cassandra. She saw it parked in front of one of the houses and knew that he lived there. If he was home remained to be seen, but Cassandra hoped so. Now that she was there, her body was on high alert, but Cassandra proceeded forward. Literally nothing else would do.
