AllFreeNovel
Share Us
By the time he was dropped off, Steven was under the impression that they were going to either have to come out with what was going on between the two of them or stop doing it. Steven saw how Luke was acting and how he was a little bit off kilter, and all Steven could think about was how it had been before. He did not want to go back there, and he certainly didn't want it to be because of him. There was just no way Steven could get away with a clear conscience. So that meant that he was going to have to talk to Cassandra and see how she felt about it.
Steven immediately dialed her number. It wasn’t a number that he called all the time, but he had started and stopped calling her many times. Sadly, he had never finished letting it ring so that she would talk to him. Now though, he had to. Now they needed to talk about what they were going to do about her brother.
She had just picked up with him when Luke burst back into the door. Steven tried to play it off like he was just messing with his phone, and he turned it upside down and hoped that Cassandra didn’t say anything else. “What's up Luke? I thought you were going home.”
“Yeah, I'm going to. I just wanted to say I'm sorry if I'm acting strange today. I've just got a lot on my mind.”
Steven agreed and told him that everything was fine. He hadn't even noticed. He had noticed of course, anyone would, but Luke was going through something and gaslighting him would just make it worse.
“Let's not lie about it; we both know what's going on. I can't let what you told me the other day get out of my head. I don't know why I care so much but I trust you Steven, and I know that you wouldn't do anything to betray me. I have known it all along, even if I didn't want to admit it. You are a good friend to me, and you don’t deserve to be accused.”
It made him feel so bad that he honestly wasn't sure if that was the point or not. If it was, it had worked spectacularly, because the two had an awkward little hug, something that they never did, and then Luke was gone again.
It took Steven a minute to think it through, to wrap his head around it just being said and done. If Steven didn't know any better, he’d think that the universe was fucking with him. Either way, it didn't feel like it could go too much longer. Whatever was going to happen, Steven just wanted that ill feeling to leave him. He wasn't used to it, and he didn't like it at all.
At the same time though, there was a real fear when he picked up the phone waiting for Luke to burst back in. He was tempted to go to the door and lock it, but that would have just made it worse. It would have fed into the hysteria that Luke was feeling. Steven did not want to get swept up in it. His friend needed to think of something else. He wasn’t going to give him a reason to stay stuck on the idea of Steven with his sister. It wasn’t helping anything.
“Hey, Cassandra, sorry about that.”
Cassandra wasn't on the phone. He could hear her talking to Luke and their conversation was going about the same way. Steven felt like he shouldn't be hearing it and he hung up the phone. What if Luke would have seen his number on the phone? What if he knew already? Steven couldn't handle all of the obsessive questions that started to riddle his mind. Honestly it was just easier to tell the truth usually. It wasn't that he was so much better morally than anybody else. His body and mind just couldn't handle all the lies. Steven had never been able to do well with it and it was no different now.
He went to take a shower and purposely didn't answer when Cassandra called a little while later. Steven had a lot to think about. They both did. How could they be okay with what was happening? Luke was obviously going off the deep end again, and it was all because of Cassandra and Steven. There was no mistake that was going to make it okay. The idea of it made him sick to his stomach.
The problem was, he was still thinking about how good it had felt to be with Cassandra, how right it had been. It was magical if he was completely honest, absolutely magical. Steven didn't want to give that up. He didn't know if he would be able to find that same feeling again. How could he give it up?
Once again, he felt like he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Steven had real feelings for Cassandra, but Luke was his best friend. How was he supposed to choose between real love and real friendship? None of the answers he came up with was good enough, not for the gaping hole that filled him with the loss of either one. It felt like no matter what he did he was going to lose. He was going to lose big.
Chapter 31
Cassandra
A week went by before Cassandra saw Steven again, and the only reason she saw him was because she went to his house and tracked him down. Cassandra didn't want to go to such lengths to see Steven, but it felt like he was avoiding her. She couldn't ask Luke what was going on with him or anything, because he was having his own issues. Cassandra didn't know what to do. The two of them had a great time together, and then it had all gone downhill in the morning.
Cassandra understood all of that. She knew how her brother was and how he had a tendency to complicate things. She also knew that how she felt with Steven was better than she had felt in a very long time. It wasn't just her either. Her son was back from his week-long excursion at his dad's and after he had eaten something, the second thing he wanted to do was see if Uncle Luke and Steven could come by. Cassandra had made the phone call, hoping to see them for herself, but the two of them had been busy.
So, that was what took Cassandra to Steven's house at about 10:00 o'clock at night a few days after their last excursion. She was not sure how to take his sudden disinterest in her, especially after they had shared so much together. She wasn't typically clingy or anything like that, but they had history, and she thought that it deserved more than him avoiding her. She wasn't one of his usual women. It was her. How could he be treating her like this?
He was not expecting Cassandra and the expression on his face showed it. Cassandra smiled at him, trying to get a feel for his mood, but he just seemed surprised more than anything. Did he really think that she wouldn't come to find out what was going on? He should have known better. Cassandra thought he knew her better than that. She had thought a lot of things, but apparently, she had been mistaken about a lot of it. That wasn't a good feeling though either, because what she was wrong about was rather important.
“Do you have time to talk?” It occurred to Cassandra then that he might not even be alone. She was making a lot of assumptions and she could be wrong about all of them. Cassandra didn't like that feeling at all. How could something so good and blissful turn into what she was dealing with then? For several moments they just stared at each other, neither one of them saying anything. Finally, Steven invited her in and said that they had time to talk. He emphasized talk though, like there wasn't time for anything else.
“Haven't seen you in a little while,” Cassandra commented as she walked in the door. Her eyes didn't fall on all the glittery things this time around. Steven liked to hide the fact that he had money. He didn't wear flashy clothes, and he didn't drive around in an attention-seeking sports car. He did spend money in his house though. Everything was gold and shiny, diamond encrusted. His home was pure opulence and Cassandra couldn't help but take it in as she set her gaze back on Steven. Why did he look different? His eyes were a little hollow, there were bags under them, and his hair didn't have the same shine to it. He looked dull. What was going on?
“I've just been busy, Cassandra. Who is with Dennis?”
Cassandra was thrown off that he was even asking what she had done with her son, like it was his place to ask or to question it to begin with. It took no time at all for annoyance to sweep through her.
“My parents have him. They've been taking him on Saturday nights and dropping him off midday Sunday. They didn't really get to see him that much when I lived in the city, so they want to make the most of it. And I was thinking that I should make the most of it as well,” Cassandra said with an unsure smile on her face. She had hoped to be in his arms by then, being told that everything was okay and something very important had kept him away. That's not what she was getting though. She was getting that she was unwanted in the current situation. Did he really not want to see her?
“I'm getting a strange feeling from you, Steven. Please tell me that I'm wrong.”
Even as Cassandra asked, she knew that she wasn't. She didn't know the reason, but Steven definitely wasn't that happy to see her. He looked like he would rather be anywhere else but there.
Steven looked away like he couldn't stand to look her in her eyes and that sinking feeling that Cassandra had was back, probably worse than ever before. Why was he looking at her like that? What had happened? What had he done? What had Lucas done? She had so many thoughts popping in her head, and she had to prompt him again to find out what was really going on. Why wouldn't he just tell her?
“I think that the two of us should put a little bit of space between us,” Steven finally got out, barely looking at her like he wasn't able to look her in her eyes. Cassandra couldn't believe what he was saying. She wanted to know the one thing that mattered. Why?
“It's your brother,” Steven admitted, though begrudgingly.
