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“I didn’t feel the same about you,” I admit. “I wasn’t pretending to hate you. I really did.”
“I can’t blame you.”
“But you were right about me trusting you before. When your dad made us do those things, I felt the safest with you. I was glad it was you touching me and not him. However, that doesn’t mean I love you.”
“Do you hate me?”
“I don’t hate you anymore. I haven’t for a while. Now, all I want is for us to have a life. Maybe together. You think we can figure that out?”
For the first time in a long time, he looks genuinely happy. “Yeah. I think we can if we put our heads together. It might take a while, but we can figure it out.”
I stretch up on tiptoes to kiss him, smiling when I pull back.
“We’ve got all the time in the world.”
CHAPTER 42
If someone had told me a few weeks ago that I would be dating Colt Alistair, I would have bet millions of dollars against it. Yet here I am, having dinner at a restaurant because neither one of us felt like cooking or eating frozen dinners again. I guess this is considered a date. Even if it came out of necessity, we’re still two people eating a meal in a public place. We also sleep in one bed every night and have sex almost every day. So yeah, dating seems like the right term, even if we have never actually called it that.
“Are we dating?” I ask point blank.
Colt stops chewing, though his cheeks are still filled with his last bite. His elbows are resting on the table. He lowers the burger he is holding with both of his hands and looks at me over the bun. His eyebrows rise, then he quickly chews and swallows his food.
“Yeah… I mean, I guess. We live, sleep, eat, and take showers together. What else would you call it?”
“Roommates? Friends with benefits?”
“I told you how I feel about you.”
“You also told me about banging some girl at MIT.”
A grin spreads across his face, and I don’t miss the sparkle in his eyes as I mention other girls.
“You know I didn’t go to MIT.”
“The girl could have been from around here. I didn’t know if that part was a lie.”
“I didn’t have sex with anyone else. Not that time or any other time. And just so we’re clear, if another guy so much as looks at you too long, I’ll fuck you in front of him, then cut his eyes out and shove them down his throat,” he tells me casually before taking another bite of his burger.
I glance around us to make sure no one heard his over-the-top threat. Luckily, we’re sitting in a quiet corner, and the restaurant isn’t too busy right now.
“So why did you say that?”
“I wanted to see if you were jealous. Clearly, you are.”
I chew on the inside of my lip. Yeah, I guess I am jealous. “I don’t want you seeing other girls.”
“I know, and I won’t. You can trust me.”
“Did it ever bother you that I had sex with Nix?” This is a sore subject, so I’m treading lightly, but I also really want to know.
“No, not Nix. That was different. There was never any jealousy between us. I’m not sure why. Maybe because I always shared everything with him. Or maybe because I trust him so completely.” He drops what’s left of his burger onto his plate. “Let’s get out of here. I’ve lost my appetite.”
“What? No! I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.”
“It’s not that. I don’t mind talking about Nix.”
“Then what—”
“Hey, Colt.”
UGH.
Deborah’s voice makes me cringe worse than nails on a chalkboard.
She walks right up to our table but doesn’t greet or acknowledge me in any other way, which I guess is a step up from belittling and bullying me. Alongside her is a guy I’ve never seen before. He seems to be our age, maybe a little older, judging by all the tattoos on his arms and hands.
Unlike Deborah, his eyes are on me, zeroing in on me in a weird and creepy way.
“Funny meeting you here.” She waits for Colt to respond, but he is more interested in the leftover fries than her. “So, did you hear Bradley went on a weekend trip and never came back?” Another moment of awkward silence. If she was anyone else I would feel bad for her.
“Do you mind if we sit with you?” Deborah asks Colt as if I’m not even here at all.
Colt ignores Deborah like she does me and directs all of his attention to the guy next to her. “You know what’s funny, Jeremy? I was just telling Leni if someone looks at her too long, I’ll fuck her in front of him, then cut his eyes out and shove them up his ass.”
