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I chuckled. “It shows, huh?”
“Why didn’t Kris do it?” He helped himself to some whiskey.
“That would be a little difficult. He’s in Aruba with his boyfriend.” I took a long drink.
Santa stared at me, his expression aghast. “But…” He swallowed. “You seemed so happy last time I saw you.”
I sighed. “I was—right up to the point where I found out the bastard was cheating on me. Had been cheating on me for an entire year, in fact.”
“But why sell the apartment?”
“Because every time I was there, all I could see was him, all right?” I didn’t bother lowering my voice. I knew no one would hear me. “I got a new job, by the way. Now I live in this quaint little town called New Hope. Beautiful place. You’d love it. I’m surprised you don’t already know about it. But maybe you’re not keeping close tabs on me the way you used to.” Another drink of whiskey. This was my second, and judging by the way I was feeling, it needed to be my last.
I heard the hitch in his breathing, and I glanced in his direction. His pained expression cut me to the quick. “That part about not keeping tabs on you…I wouldn’t want you to think I was… stalking you.”
“But youdowatch me, don’t you?”
“Notwatch, exactly. I seem to know if you’re going through… turbulence.”
I snorted. “I imagine the day I found out about Kris’s cheating, there would have been quite a lot of that.”
“You’d be right.” He sighed. “You havenoidea the effort it took to come here and not launch into an interrogation, to learn what had happened. I was aiming for nonchalance.”
“Then you pretty much nailed it.” Another drink from my glass.
The pain was still etched across his face. “You’re hurting.”
“Yup, but I’ll heal. Just need to find myself a hot older guy, add another notch to my bedpost, and forget Kris.” The words came out more flippantly than I’d intended, but that was how I felt.
I need to get laid. A lot.
And I needed to change the subject.
“Anyhow, Mom asked me to come stay for the holidays. I saw the offer for what it was—an olive branch.”
“They never did warm to Kris, did they?”
“No, they did not. But to be honest, they haven’t mentioned his name once since I arrived. They’re too busy cooing over my nephew and niece.”
He beamed. “That’s wonderful.”
“Yeah, Ben and Layla finally made them grandparents. I think they were beginning to despair.”
He sipped his whiskey. “Ever thought about having kids?”
I shrugged. “Thought about it. Decided against it.” And for some reason I didn’t feel comfortable discussing this. Ben was welcome to have as many kids as he wanted. Layla could pop them out like peas for all I cared.
Maybe some people aren’t made to have children.
It wasn’t a realization I was keen to discuss with Santa. After all, this was the man who loved kids, right?
Time to change the subject.
I glanced at him. “How are you?”
“I’m good.”
Helookedthe same, but… Was I imagining a few more lines on his brow? The slight downward curl of his lips? The dark smudges under his eyes?
