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“I’ve been thinking a lot about Babble since we talked, and I did come up with one cool possibility.” Josh turned to me with wide eyes. “So, I went through your posts these past few days, and I noticed that aside from relationships, you post a lot about sport game totals and school events, right?”
I nodded. “Yeah, it works really well to keep people updated. That’s originally what Babble was.”
“Well, what if you made a blog about that?” Josh tilted his head to the side. “Brentwood doesn’t have a school-dedicated blog, and they don’t keep their website updated with current events. What if that was what you did? I mean, you would have to get rid of the relationship aspect, but it could be a great way to keep some readership.”
I made a soft sound under my breath, running it through my head. He was right—though lately I’d been leaning heavily on the relationship side of things, and this year’s Most Likely Tos, most of Brentwood Babble was keeping students updated on current events. “How would I know what to post when?”
“Maybe Principal Oliphant can give you a list of important events or something like that?” Josh shrugged and ducked his head a bit bashfully. “I mean, it’s an idea. I’ll keep thinking about it. But it could be fun.”
“No, I like that,” I said earnestly. “It’s a great idea. It wouldn’t be the exact same, but this way I wouldn’t have to say goodbye to Babble completely. That’s really smart, you know. I wouldn’t have thought of that.”
“What can I say? This brain is good for something.” His dimples came in full force as he lifted his chin, letting the sunlight catch his cheekbones. Josh cleared his throat, giving me a sidelong look. “Since I helped…can I ask you a weird question?”
“Shoot.”
“Do you see me…romantically?”
I forced the bike to a halt, handlebars twisting a little at my sudden stop. “What?”
His smile seemed more boyish, and when he spoke again, his voice was a bit more confident. “Do you see me romantically?”
“I think you’re cute,” I told him quickly, frantically thinking for the right response. I desperately didn’t want to say the wrong thing. “You’re really nice, too. And funny.”
“But can you see yourself kissing me?” He tilted his head almost curiously. “Being your first kiss?”
If Kissable Josh had been introduced to me before the List, if I’d met him before kissing Reed, who knew what might’ve happened? But he was just barely too late.
“It’s okay,” he said when I didn’t reply. “Really. I meant it when I said I was looking for friends, you know. I’m not hanging around you because I thought anything would happen between us. I’m only trying to…read the room. And it probably came off super blunt and awkward.”
Despite it being blunt and awkward, I smiled. “It’s not that I don’t think you’d be a good kisser,” I told him, which made him chuckle, but it also made my heart skip a beat. “I…I already had my first kiss. The day before I met you. But I didn’t tell Rachel.”
“Why wouldn’t you tell Rachel?” I could feel Josh looking at me, could practically see his turned head from the corner of my eye. It only took him a second to connect the dots. “Wait. Did you kissReed?”
I nearly had a mini heart attack. Seriously. “How—how did—”
“Why else not tell your best friend?” His expression wasn’t judgmental, thank God—it was open, curious, kind. Peak Josh.
I wasn’t sure why I wanted to be so honest with him, but the words were drawn out of me like a magnet attracting metal. There was no fighting the pull, nor the strange relief that came from finally being honest with someone. Anyone. “It was the stupid list’s fault,” I said, and my next words came in a rush. “I hated that I was on it, and I kissed Reed to get it over with. Even though no one else would know about it, I did, and that felt…enough, I guess. Rachel didn’treallyhave to know. It was a ‘one and done’ thing.”
“So, you didn’t catch feelings?”
“You make it sound like it’s a cold.”
“It kind of is, though, isn’t it? Starts as a tickle in your throat and soon you’ve got a fever and your stomach hurts every time you think of them?” Josh made a softhmmnoise under his breath. “I guess, not that I’d know, but that’s how a lot of people describe it, right?”
Maybe Josh wasn’t wrong. Liking Reed was kind of like catching a virus, one that was near impossible to shake. Even now, two days without contact, I found myself thinking about him, wondering what he was doing. And it was the single kiss that had spread the germ, one that had gotten me so messed up.
“It happened weeks ago,” I reassured Josh now, nodding. “And it was a one-time thing. So don’t worry about me stealing him from Cindy or anything. It’s—it’s not like that.”
“I don’t think their relationship is as serious as you make it out to be. She invited Ashton over last night for a movie.”
“But she’s going to the homecoming dance with Reed.”
“Dates to homecoming are something that people just do,” Josh told me. “It doesn’t mean you’re official or anything. It’s only so you won’t have to go alone.”
It was interesting to think that Cindy was talking to more guys than Reed. I couldn’t see why she wouldwantto talk to anyone else but him. And a guy like Ashton? He was nice, but not on Reed’s level. Then again, Reed was the player in this duo, wasn’t he? It made sense that this wasn’t as serious for him either, given his dating history.
Josh and I approached a stop sign that branched off to our separate roads. I’d continue straight onto my street, whereas he had to walk left to eventually make it to his house. We both hesitated at the crosswalk, turning toward each other. “Do you have a date to homecoming?” I asked him, squeezing my handlebars tighter.
