AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“That it’s better just to keep things simple. I get a taste of how awesome it is to raise my own animals, live on the land, but I don’t have to be a slave to it like the Walkers do. It’s the best of both worlds.”
“Oh. Yes, I suppose it is.” I reached for my cup again, even though it was empty, and fiddled with the straw. I just felt fidgety and on edge, and something Dusty had said right before we left wasn’t sitting right with me.
“So, what about you? Are you going to keep going up to White Pines?”
I looked up in surprise. “Me? Why wouldn’t I? I have the time, and I enjoy it, and I’m getting to know Audrey and all the kids pretty well. It’s been great.”
“Well, yeah, but for how long? You’ll stop when the weather gets better, right?”
I shook my head slowly. “Nooo, I wasn’t planning on it. Morgan’s talking about extending the program through the summer if there’s enough interest. I’ll probably be spending more time there, not less.”
He turned back to the road. “Oh. I see.” After a minute, he started nodding. “You know what? I think you should go for it, then. You enjoy it, and that’s important. Those little kids probably worship you.”
“Far from it! They keep me on my toes. I think I learn more from them than they learn from me, but it’s great. You should come back sometime. I think you’d have fun.”
“I don’t see when, but I’ll try.” He smiled and reached for my hand. “Even if I can’t come, I’m proud to be dating the kind of girl who donates her time for that sort of thing. That’s cool.”
I smiled. “Thanks.”
Dad was puttering in the garage when I got home that evening. For once, I didn’t really feel like helping. I made a half-hearted offer and didn’t object when he waved me off. That was perfect because I wanted nothing more than a long soak in the bubble bath and a hot tea. I really needed to be alone to chew on some things.
What was I doing with Austen? It was almost momentum at this point. I’d started dating him out of curiosity, and he’d never given me a reason to break up with him. He was sometimes a little dense, but he was always kind, always fun to be around.
He seemed to value me for who I was. Yes, he always complimented my looks and sometimes asked me to wear something in particular that he liked. But I had to be careful not to be too sensitive about that. Just because I’d had more than my fill of guys who only wanted me for my appearance didn’t mean it was unreasonable for my boyfriend to want me to look good. He didn’t like it when I smelled like a grease monkey, but who would? He said he supported the things I wanted to do, and that mattered.
But I didn’t think about him when we were apart. That alone was enough to scare me. Why would I waste my time and risk my heart on a man who was just “fine” when we were together and not special enough to daydream about when we weren’t?
I’d started to say something about that to Audrey one day, hoping she could advise me, but she’d been distracted with her own problems. “Love takes time, girl. Give that flower a season to bloom.” And then she’d had to stop Lizzy from poking someone with a stick. We never got back around to talking about my love life.
Seeing Dusty again today had sent another bell clanging in my mind. I still liked him. A lot.
I’d assumed it was just a matter of proximity, the chemistry of people who work well together. I’d always developed a bit of a thing for co-workers that, while not necessarily romantic, sometimes felt like it. That was why I’d been so rigid in never dating anyone I worked with, because I didn’t trust myself to know the difference between an 8-5 friendship and something precious before it was too late.
But today, I knew. He didn’t even do anything. Hadn’t even noticed me yet, but when I leaned over that arena rail, my heart jumped out of my chest as I watched him charging with his rope flying on that great white beauty. The thought flitted through my mind that he was everything a cowboy should be—tough and quick, strong enough to pull down a half-ton steer, and gentle enough to hold a bolt of lightning on a shoestring rein. The kind of man who knew what it was to be loyal and make sacrifices, who could laugh with a ten-year-old kid who’d roped him over the cowboy hat, and who could wipe the tears off a fourth-grader’s cheeks. And I was just now recognizing it.
I was a grade A idiot.
He didn’t even like me! I’d tried to give him a chance to say something, and he didn’t take it. For a heartbeat, I’d even thought he might kiss me, but then he just apologized for not coming up to White Pines. Like something a co-worker would say.
Maybe I’d scared him, or maybe he didn’t understand that was what I was doing. I would have kept trying, except for that strange thing he said when Austen offered to help me put his horse away. “She’s so lucky to have you.”
I couldn’t see his face when he said it, and I didn’t really hear his tone because a horse had whinnied right then. But it could only mean one thing. He thought Austen and I were great together. A guy who liked me as more than a friend would never say that—he’d be trying to find a way to show me that Austen wasn’t right for me instead of saying I was lucky to have him.
I closed my eyes and slipped below the foamy suds in the bathtub. At least if my face was already wet, those wouldn’t feel like tears gathering in the corners of my eyes.
Chapter 20
Dusty
IhateValentine’sDay.
I’ve never liked it, just on the principle of the thing. A man was supposed to prove he loved his girlfriend or wife more than the next guy loved his, based on the amount of chocolate he bought or the extravagance of the date he took her on. It was stupid, shallow, and transparent marketing ploy to sell candy and greeting cards.
And also, I’d never had anyone I could call “My Valentine.” So it was stupid, as far as I was concerned.
All the restaurants in town would be crowded tonight, with guys taking their ladies out for a dinner they didn’t have to cook. Everyone from teenagers to pensioners would be out in their best outfits, smiling dreamily across the table at the one person who made their hearts go pitter-patter.
We Walkers didn’t pay much attention, though. Cows have to eat, horses have to be looked after, and life on the ranch doesn’t miss a beat. It was just another Tuesday—one more Tuesday I’d stayed home to work instead of seeing Jess. She probably had other plans tonight, anyway.
