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Savannah frowned, and I held my breath. “Wait. What are we going to do with Rex and Hedgie when we go to Japan? Can they go with us?”
I shook my head slowly. “No. I wish they could, but Bennett and Wren offered to take care of them while we’re gone. Or they can stay with Susan and Larry, Willa, and Daisy at Alpaca Acres.”
“Oh. Okay.” She considered it a moment. “I’ll miss them, but I know they’ll be in good hands. And I’m excited about our trip.”
Well, okay.That had gone surprisingly well. I’d anticipated that Hedgie and Rex might be a sticking point for Savannah.
“But what about Ellie?” Savannah asked.
And here came the hard part. If the kids couldn’t accept my relationship with Elle, we were doomed.
“You know that I love Mommy, and I will always love Mommy.”
Savannah and Maddox glanced at each other. I wondered what they were thinking.
“And she will always be part of our lives. We will always talk about her and meet her in the castle library and honor her memory.”
“Daddy, you’re really scaring me,” Savannah said, fidgeting with her hands.
I just needed to do it. I needed to say it.
“I love Ellie.”
“I know. So do we,” Savannah said.
I shook my head. They weren’t getting it. “I love her, and I want her to be part of our family.”
Maddox furrowed his brow. “Sheispart of our family.”
I was fucking this all up.
“Yes, but I want her to be my girlfriend,” I said, thinking it sounded odd to call Elle that when she was so much more to me. “My partner.”
They were both quiet a moment. It was agony waiting for them to respond, but I wanted to give them space to process this news. I’d spoken to their grief counselor about it, and she thought it was a great thing. But I had no idea how the kids would react.
Finally, Savannah said, “So, you would kiss Ellie?”
I nodded.
“And do things like go on dates with her?”
“Yes. Exactly.”
“Would she be our new mom?” Maddox asked.
“No, bud.” I reached out and took his hand in mine, giving it a gentle squeeze. “No one can ever replace your mom. She’ll always be part of our lives too.”
“Would you have a baby?” Savannah asked. And if I wasn’t mistaken, she sounded excited. Or maybe that was just me being hopeful.
“I, uh—” I tugged at the collar of my shirt. Jeez. My kids were grilling me. “Maybe in the future. I don’t know. If we did, how would you feel about that?”
She started crying, and I pulled her onto my lap, rubbing my hand up and down her back. “It’s okay to cry. I’m sure you both have a lot of big feelings about this. It’s a huge change.”
“I’m not crying because I’m sad,” Savannah said, swiping away her tears. “I’m crying because I’m happy, Daddy.”
The relief—and shock—hit me instantly, and I worked to keep my jaw from dropping. “Really?”
“Yeah. I love Ellie. And now we’ll always get to be with her. And if you get married, I could be a flower girl. And if you have a baby, I could be a big sister.” Her smile was radiant.
